


One Difference: Donna and Kelso Have a Fling

by MistyMountainHop



Series: T7S: One Difference [7]
Category: That '70s Show
Genre: Angst and Humor, F/M, Gen, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-18
Updated: 2015-07-22
Packaged: 2018-03-31 04:16:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3964063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyMountainHop/pseuds/MistyMountainHop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Believing she's lost Eric forever, Donna accepts Kelso's offer to have a fun, commitment-free fling. They plan on keeping it a secret, but Jackie and Hyde's own summer secret complicates matters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hot Sand

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.
> 
>  **Author's Note:** Jackie, Hyde, and Eric star in this fic, too. Just later.

CHAPTER ONE  
**HOT SAND**

Donna breathed in the California air, relieved to be out of Kelso's Microbus. They'd parked in front of Mom's rental house, where pink, yellow, and white flowers grew in pots. The sky was a deeper blue than she'd ever seen, but she sagged against the front door, appreciating the flowers' aroma more than the splendor of Malibu.

"Kelso," she said, gesturing toward the back of the house, "drive around already!" Though Kelso's Volkswagen was a cool-looking ride—it had a follow-a-rock-band-around-the-country vibe—it was also blocking her view of the neighborhood. "I told you where the garage is!"

The Microbus's engine shut off in response. Kelso stumbled onto the sidewalk, gasped at the fresh air, and muttered, "Stupid mermaid."

Her lips pressed together, trapping a snarky comment, but she really couldn't blame him. She wouldn't have lasted a second longer inside that death trap. The stink of rotten fish had followed them from Wisconsin and across six states. They'd searched for the source in Lincoln, Nebraska, digging their hands into the seat cushions. Upon finding nothing, Kelso came up with myriad theories, but only one stuck: the Microbus was haunted by a mermaid.

"But going to California will solve all that," he'd said in Glenwood Springs, Colorado. "The mermaid's ghost just needs to be returned to the open sea."

He elaborated on his theory at various points, and it entertained her at first, making the drive seem shorter. Then, once he got into the details of inter-species sex, she wished for sweet death. "But who was the first guy who fucked a fish?" he'd said in Utah's Fishlake National Forest. "And how big was that fish? It must've been, like, a whale."

"Whales aren't fish, dumbass," she'd said. "They're mammals."

"Oh. That makes more sense. Whales are mammals, and humans are mammals, so they gotta be compatible, right?"

She never answered him, though he asked a dozen times. The prospect of enduring this kind of nonsense all summer had given her a headache. It dotted her mind with scorpions, already a wasteland of bleak thoughts. Aspirin didn't help. Only Eric could do that, and he was over two-thousand miles away.

Kelso, however, was about a foot away. He'd joined her on the porch, and she rang the doorbell while he yammered on about the beach.

"Where's your mom?" he said after a minute and tried to unzip her duffel bag. "I gotta buy sunscreen, and I don't wanna be all red and scaly for the Cali chicks."

She smacked his hand off the zipper and adjusted the strap on her shoulder. "If you want something, ask," she said.

"Who's got time to ask? I need protection, Donna. The sun's brighter here than in Wisconsin!"

"It's really not," she said, but the weather was definitely warmer. A short walk would take them to Malibu Lagoon State Beach. Swimwear was packed in her bag, but Kelso had left Point Place with just the clothes on his back. He'd withdrawn money in Kenosha from his bank account. Bought a cheap shirt and deodorant, but he'd have to spend the rest on a summer wardrobe.

She rang the doorbell again, more forcefully. She hoped Mom hadn't been called to work an earlier shift, but she had the restaurant's phone number and address just in case.

Kelso put his ear to the door. "I hear something. I think she's—" The door opened before he could move and bashed his face. "Ow!"

He stepped back, rubbing his check and temple. His pain lifted her mood, but the sight of Mom in the doorway, appearing tan and healthy, brought an unexpected measure of peace.

"Donna?" Mom said. "Oh, my God, your father and I were worried sick!" She opened her arms wide, and Kelso dashed into them.

"Midge!" he shouted and pressed his chest into hers. "I missed you so much!"

Donna grabbed his shoulders and yanked the him backward. He crashed into a flower pot, but she took her place in Mom's arms and said, "I'm sorry I didn't call you again after last night. We just wanted to get here and kept on driving." She shut her eyes as Mom held her, feeling much younger than seventeen. "I should have called."

"Oh, I don't care," Mom said. "I'm just glad you're here and safe." She kissed Donna's head then broke from the embrace. "But I thought you'd taken the bus. What's he doing here?" She jutted her chin in Kelso's direction. "You're not dating him to spite his brother? Or Eric?"

"No way!" Donna suppressed a gag. The idea of dating another Kelso was nauseating. "He and I both needed to get out of Point Place for a little while, and he offered to drive me."

"Okay, but I have to warn you..." Mom led them into a living room decorated in ocean blues and sea-foam white, "I only have one guest bedroom, and it's cozy."

"That's all right," Kelso said and slung his arm around Donna's shoulders. "Me and Big Red—"

"Hey! I told you to stop calling me that." Donna scowled at him, but he squeezed her shoulders in a sideways hug, as if she hadn't said anything.

"We go way back," he went on. "Man, we're practically siblings. I think we can handle staying together in a small room."

"Yeah … no." She elbowed him in the ribs, and he backed off with a grunt. He'd hit on her constantly during the drive here. A breast-grab in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. A knee-squeeze in St. George, Utah. No matter how many times she told him to stop, or how badly she hurt him in self-defense, he never gave up.

But, much to her on-going distress, she didn't hate the attention. Each time he copped a feel, his touch revolted her less and less. Casey had dropped her like a torn mudflap, and Eric saw her as spoiled goods. Knowing that someone wanted her, even a submental man-whore, had become a kind of consolation.

Kelso groaned. "Fine, no bed-sharing!" And he jerked his hand toward the rattan sofa. "You'll take the couch, Big D, and I'll take the room."

"Ha, ha, ha..." She blanked-out her expression, hoping her dull stare sent the message, and linked arms with Mom. "Show me the guest room."

"Wait for me!" Kelso followed closely, stepping on Donna's heels. Her left shoe partially came off at the doorway.

She turned around and gripped the door frame with both hands, blocking him from the room. "Have fun on the sofa, dink." Her left foot swung toward his crotch, and he leapt backward. "Your reflexes are getting better."

"Yup, that kick to my beanbags in Vegas really taught—"

She slammed the door and cut off his last words. Mom began a short tour of the guest room, describing the sparse furniture and cramped space in optimistic terms. Donna put on a smile, but without Eric the summer was going to suck. Big-time.

* * *

Making the phone call to Dad was uncomfortable. Donna had given messages to him on the road through Mom, but now she had to talk to him herself. She put on her sweetest voice when he picked up, and after his declarations of love and relief, he tried to ground her.

"Can't it wait until I get back home?" she said. "After everything that's happened, I really need a vacation. To, you know, regroup."

The phone went silent, and she held her breath. Was he consulting Joanne? A hushed, "I know, I know," came through the receiver, but a moment later he agreed to Donna's request. Not that he could enforce a grounding from Point Place. "But when you get home," he said, "you are grounded, young lady. … Um, when do you think that'll be?"

"Back in time for school," she said and coughed for air. The pain in his voice had closed around her lungs. She'd never intended to hurt him, and she didn't speak again until her lungs sucked in a few deep breaths. "I'm sorry for running away. It had nothing to do with you. … I love you, Dad."

"I know, Pumpkin. I just hate that you're so darned sad, but Eric—"

"Dad, stop." She twisted the phone cord around her fingers. "He's off-limits for the summer, okay?"

He didn't argue, and they hung up as the smell of bacon wafted into the room. Mom had cooked lunch, and Donna followed her nose to the kitchen. Kelso was already seated at the breakfast table. She sat across from him, and Mom served them cheese omelets.

"So," Donna said after Mom sat next to her, "how have the auditions been going?"

Mom's face brightened "Oh, they've been wonderful! I landed a national commercial for fabric softener; can you believe it? I thought my ad for the local Ford dealership was big, but the money I've made let me go part-time at my waitressing job. Now I have more time to audition!"

Donna bit into a piece of bacon. "Thank God. I hate where you work."

"Why?" Kelso said. "Is it a dump? Do rats poo in the food?"

"No." Donna sipped her orange juice and tried not to think of the bubonic plague. "It's a bar and grill where middle-aged men ogle the female waitstaff." She wrinkled her nose. "It's demeaning."

"It isn't demeaning, honey," Mom said. "The other waitresses are half my age, but I get the biggest tips."

Kelso chuckled. "That's because you probably have the biggest jugs."

"Kelso!" Donna slammed her fist into his arm, causing his fork to drop to his plate.

"Ow! That one's gonna show on my skin." He rubbed his arm and grinned. "You've made me all rugged-looking with these bruises. Beach chicks are gonna fall all over me."

She flicked a bacon crumb at him. His ability to turn negatives into positives was enviable, but she steered the conversation away from his libido … with only moderate success. Fortunately, Mom seemed oblivious to his innuendos. He tried to explain them while she and Donna did the dishes, but Mom didn't listen. She was too excited about showing Donna the ocean.

Malibu Lagoon State Beach—or _Surfrider Beach,_ as locals called it—was full of tan surfers and sunbathers. Donna didn't look directly at them. Their sunny attitudes threatened to burn her retinas. If they had any problems, none of them were conspicuous, but sand flew into Donna's sandals with each step. It was gritty beneath her feet, a reminder of the road she'd chosen.

Wisdom might've come too late to save her, but Kelso still had time. His gaze roved the sand as Mom brought them closer to the shoreline. Technically, he was still with Jackie. He was just "taking a break," as he'd explained days ago. That being the case, Donna wouldn't let him cheat on Jackie again, not on her watch.

" _Jackie_ would love it here," she said as a big-breasted blond strode past them. Her bikini barely covered her, and Donna grabbed hold of Kelso's shirt before he could give chase. "If you go after that girl, you're sleeping on the beach tonight."

He fell back in line, faster than Donna expected. "I can't sleep on the beach! Sand'll get into my ass crack."

Mom shushed him and pointed to their left. "Look over there," she said. A pier stretched out into the ocean. Not quite a boardwalk, but according to Mom, it had a cafe, shake shack, and a tiki bar. One could also rent beach equipment there or hire a boat.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Mom said minutes later at the shoreline. "The ocean's so blue! I never knew water came in that color until I got here."

Donna nodded as the surf rushed over her toes. The water was colder than the sand, but her brain remained parched. Kelso's whining didn't help either: _he wasn't beach-ready; he couldn't showcase his natural bulge without swim trunks; his skin was burning._

To shut him up, they went inland from the beach to a row of shops. They stopped in front of one that sold swimwear, but Mom had to get ready for work. She kissed Donna on the forehead and cupped her chin. "I'm so glad you're here, honey."

"So am I," Donna said, but with Kelso by her side instead of Eric, the words were a lie.

* * *

Donna and Kelso sat by the crashing waves, after spending a half-hour buying supplies. Swimsuits, sunscreen, and two long towels protected their skin, but nothing kept Donna's thoughts from burning. Unlike the waves, regrets about the last year refused to ebb.

Kelso, though, seemed as carefree as ever. He drank from a frozen smoothie and pointed out the local sights. "I'm in heaven," he said, following a loud slurp. "Chicks don't dress like this in Wisconsin. Hell, chicks don't _look_ like this in Wisconsin..." he glanced at Donna, "except for one. You should bleach your hair and start wearing bikinis instead of that boring one-piece. Bring some California to Wisconsin."

She groaned, even as blood heated her neck. He had to be concocting a plan to sleep with as many California girls as possible. He'd probably tell her all about it, too.

"So," he began, and she prepared to give him a speech about monogamy, "you ready to tell me why you ran away?"

Her shoulders stiffened, and her gaze shot to the ocean. Surfers were paddling from the shore on their boards, lining up to catch waves. On the way to California, Kelso had bugged her about Eric at every state border: _Did Eric say anything stupid?_ _Gloat about Casey flaking out?_

She chewed on a fingernail then stopped herself. It was a bad habit she'd developed on the road. "Why do you want to know so badly?" she said.

"To see if there's something good I can burn Eric with when we get back. Oh, and 'cause I care about you and stuff."

"You do not. You just wanna get into my pants."

"Of course I wanna get into your pants. So what? That doesn't mean I don't care about you."

She searched his face for any insincerity. The nape of her neck grew hotter when she found none. "Huh. You really mean it."

"Well, yeah. Like I said before, we've known each other a bajillion years. You had my back when I was cheating on Jackie, and you totally could've burned me with it. Even Hyde kept trying to get me caught, but you didn't."

His sentiment soured her stomach. What she'd done wasn't praise-worthy. She and Eric had both chosen Kelso over Jackie, convincing themselves they were protecting her from pain. But the truth was they'd been protecting Kelso … and themselves. She'd thought less of herself ever since. Worse, she couldn't say she wouldn't do the same thing again.

"You're a real friend, Donna," Kelso said and tore the top off his smoothie, He tipped the large cup toward his mouth, and the last bits of slush tumbled out. "And I knew Casey was gonna hurt you. And I told Eric to get you away from him."

The heat from her nape traveled to her cheeks. "You did?"

"Yup. If you think I'm bad, Casey's, like, a thousand times worse. I mean, I can't believe you fell for his I'm-going-to-a-car-show act all those times he went out of town."

Her cheeks flushed hotter than the beach sand. She should have known better about Casey, but she'd been in too much pain. With Mom gone and her breakup with Eric, falling for Casey's sweet-talk was all too easy. "What is it with you Kelsos?"

"We think it's selfish to give _this,_ " he waved a hand over his body, "to only one woman."

Her gaze dulled. "Seriously."

"Totally."

A giant wave broke against the shore. Women swimming nearby screamed as the ocean tossed them at the beach. Sand coated their arms, legs, and buttocks, but no bones appeared to be broken. Only pride, especially for one woman whose bikini had been pushed above her breasts.

She yanked the bikini back to its proper place, but she hunched over as she bolted to her sunbathing spot. Her humiliation mirrored what boiled past Donna's skin.

"Eric never cheated on me," Donna said and grabbed a pair of sunglasses from her beach bag. She put them on, in case her eyes misbehaved by shedding tears.

Kelso nodded. "He's a good guy. He loves you more than he does his lightsaber."

"Yeah." She couldn't stop herself from sounding morose. "I was more important to him than _Star Wars._ "

"No, that's what he calls his penis."

"What?"

His expression froze. "Shit. I wasn't supposed to tell you that." He blinked a few times, and his face regained normal movement. "We all got drunk one night. Like, really drunk, and we fessed up about what we name our parts."

"Yuck! Eric's never said anything about his … _part's_ nickname."

"It's a good thing, too. 'Cause no guy wants to hear, 'Yuck!' from his girl when he describes his iron rod—though Eric's is probably made of cheap plastic."

Donna shuddered. Now she was skeeved out on top of everything else. "Okay, I think we're done here." She gestured to the expanse of beach. "Go find a slut to play with."

"Which one?"

"I don't care."

Kelso's attention wandered over the sand to women lying on towels, to women making sandcastles or running into the surf. After a minute, he shook his head, as if he were in the midst of an existential crisis.

Against her better judgment, Donna said, "What's wrong?"

"There's too many of them. I don't know where to start."

"Give me a break." She pointed to a random girl, who'd just gotten a smoothie from the concession stand. "How about her?"

"She's a brunette. I'm off brunettes. They remind me of Jackie."

"You miss her?"

"I love her … but I don't think we're right for each other. Which is weird 'cause how can you love someone who's not right for you?"

"Ask my parents."

Her response was a whisper. She wasn't sure he'd even heard it, but he eventually said, "Your mom leaving really messed you up, huh? No wonder you dated my brother."

"Shut up," she said and slapped his chest. His skin was warm and tacky with mostly-absorbed sunscreen, but she wasn't angry at him. His attempts at sensitivity were as sweet as they were clumsy. She pointed to a blond walking toward the surf. "Her."

He stared at her selection. "She's got piano-bench legs."

"She's got what?"

"Her legs. There's no difference between her calf and ankle. Yeah, the top of her is smokin' hot, but those legs..." His eyes shut, and his lips puckered, like he'd bitten into raw cilantro.

She gestured to another blond. This one he'd be sure to go for. She was model-tall, had huge breasts, and her legs had defined calves and slim ankles. She was out of Kelso's league, but that had never stopped him before.

"She has a rat face," he said.

"She does not. She's gorgeous."

"Yeah, to rats."

She laughed. "Come on."

"No, thank you. I don't wanna come anywhere near that rat-face."

"Really? A dirty pun? You're as bad as Fez."

"No, Fez is as bad as _me._ " He hiked a thumb at himself. "Where do you think he got it from?"

Donna peered up at the deep blue sky. His sense of humor was gross, but his self-awareness about it was both surprising and refreshing. Nasty jokes, however, wouldn't combat his newfound choosiness. "I give up," she said. "You're on your own."

"But I drove you here. You owe me."

"I'm giving you a place to stay. My mom's feeding you. We're even. Anyway, you never needed help picking up skanks in Wisconsin. You don't need it now."

"But, but—!" He flailed his arm and knocked over his newly-purchased backpack. "I'm overwhelmed here, Donna!"

"Too bad." She moved her feet off her towel and dug them into the hot sand. It was uncomfortable, enough to sear Eric from her mind.

She wiggled her toes in an attempt to bury herself deeper. The sand flew over her feet and tickled her ankles. Kelso, meanwhile, tracked a few women on the shoreline with his eyes. None of them appeared to hold his interest for long, and he said, "Wanna hit San Polo Beach?"

She didn't. San Polo was a twenty-minute drive from here, and they were approaching three o'clock. "Why? Think you'll have an easier time picking out your first California girl?"

"No, but this beach is lame, and your mom said San Polo has a boardwalk and rides. I wanna go where I can eat cotton candy and win things."

She huffed a breath. "You are such a kid." But San Polo did sound like a better distraction than scorching her feet. She stood up and slipped on her flip-flops. "Let's go," she said, "but as a precaution I'm holding onto the keys to your bus."

Because no way would she let him strand her if he found the _beach chick_ of his life.


	2. Nothing Serious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER TWO  
**NOTHING SERIOUS**

Kelso learned in history class that an army marched on its stomach. But after going on a ton of rides at San Polo Beach and eating too much sugar, his stomach felt like an army was marching on it.

Donna seemed to share his predicament, grumbling and rubbing her stomach. He offered to rub it for her after the last roller coaster, but she shouted, "No!" like he was a misbehaving puppy and slapped his hand away.

She couldn't slap away his eyes, though, and he took full advantage of that fact. Her white T-shirt showed too little cleavage, but her nipples poked through. Khaki shorts covered her hips and ass, but her legs were so long it didn't matter.

"Would you quit staring at me?" she said on their walk to the midway. "You're gonna bump into someone."

"N'uh-uh. I can look at two things at once— _three_ things." His gaze shot to the boardwalk. "See?" Then he refocused on her breasts. "I'm multitasking."

"Whatever." She grasped his head and forced him to look ahead. "Stay."

"Fine," he said but flicked his eyes toward her whenever he could. Her body was hard to resist, but San Polo did have more distractions than the beach by Midge's house.

The boardwalk was crowded with people: oldies, hotties, fatties. Kids who'd someday be old or hot or fat. He kept these thoughts to himself, however. Donna appreciated his astute observations as much as his offers of physical comfort. She should've accepted his belly-rub. They both would've benefited from it.

Luckily, the midway was the land of opportunity. She'd learn to appreciate him here, where he could show off his skills. At the Balloon Pop, he demonstrated his precision with throwing sharp objects, but his darts bounced off the balloons. The game had to be rigged. The darts were blunted; the balloons couldn't have been fully inflated, but Donna popped every balloon she aimed at.

He experienced the same problem at the Barrel Toss. Despite perfect throws, his baseballs bounced out of the barrels. This game had to be rigged, too. The barrels were made of rubber or filled with invisible, ball-repelling magnets.

Donna's throws should've supported his theories, but she didn't have his trouble. Her baseballs landed in the barrels and stayed in the barrels. The greasy-haired game operator must've shut off the magnets or given her a different set of balls. How else could she have made all three of her shots?

"You know, sometimes I wish I was a hot chick," Kelso said as she collected her latest prize, a small, plush starfish. "One, so I could play with my own boobs. Two, so I could get special treatment from dudes the way you hot chicks always do."

"Kelso, quit complaining." She led him past an old lady eating ice cream, and his stomach gurgled. "You get special treatment, too, but from girls. And you could have your own breasts. Just start eating more."

"But those'll be fat-guy boobs."

She laughed, and though she wasn't taking his grievances seriously, he laughed, too. Lifting her gloomy attitude was worth being misunderstood. So far, all his other attempts had failed.

The next game they played was the Balloon Burst. They each shot water from a gun at a plastic clown face. The stream pushed against a trigger, inflating a balloon above the clown. He had this one in the bag. His experience with water guns was unmatched, but Donna's balloon popped half a second before his did.

"Damn!" His shoulders slumped as the game operator gave Donna a plush ice cream cone.

"I'm not keeping it." She dropped the ice cream cone into her beach bag. It wasn't a large prize or even a medium, but at least it was a prize. "I'm giving it to Fez when we get back to Wisconsin."

"But I wanted to win that prize for Fez."

"Isn't the important thing that Fez gets it?"

"No, the important thing is who gets credit. Like when I bullied Eric into writing my fourth-grade paper on the Incas."

"I punched you for that, didn't I?"

"Yeah, but I still got a B-plus." He searched the boardwalk for a game he could definitely win. He found it past five other booths: the High Striker. "Let's try that one."

They peered up at the game's tower together. It had to be twenty-feet tall. Intimidating, even for him, but she said, "Sure."

"Step right up!" the game operator said. "One quarter, one hit." He had a bushy mustache and a potbelly. His sleeveless shirt showed off his arms, and for a fat guy he had some muscular biceps. "Ring the bell, and win a prize for your lady."

"I'm not his lady," Donna said.

"Oh, well..." the game operator elbowed Kelso's side, "maybe if you ring that bell, she'll let you ring hers. Am I right, or am I right?"

Kelso chuckled, and Donna shoved her bag at him. "I'll show you who's a lady." She slapped a quarter into the game operator's hand and swiped the mallet from him. Then, without any practice swings, she thrust the mallet into the air and smashed it onto the High Striker's base.

The puck shot up the tower and hit the bell. The game operator's mouth fell open, but Kelso was more impressed than surprised. Donna had always been strong. He often imagined what her body could do to him when violence wasn't involved.

"I get it now," the game operator said and gestured to Kelso. "You're _her_ lady."

"Hey!" Kelso said. "I might be as pretty as a girl, but I'm not a chick." He paid the game operator a quarter and exchanged Donna's bag for the mallet. He flexed his arms a few times, loosening up his muscles. Then he hit the High Striker's base, but the puck flew halfway up the tower before gravity dragged it back down.

The game operator raised his eyebrows at Donna, an unspoken burn. Kelso threw another quarter at him and hit the base again. The puck soared two-thirds up the tower.

"Closer," she said.

"This thing is rigged." He passed the mallet back to the game operator. "All these games are rigged!"

Donna opened her beach bag and presented her winnings like a model on _The Price Is Right._ "Yeah, _so_ rigged."

"Rigged so men will lose. _God._ "

"Don't be such a sore loser." She pointed to the Frog Bomb game, where stuffed animals dangled from the booth's roof. "Want me to win you a teddy bear?"

"Will you let me tell our friends _I_ won it?"

"No."

He crossed his arms over his chest. His pride might've been wounded, but he did like when girls gave him things. "Yeah, all right," he said. "I'll let you win me a teddy bear."

* * *

Kelso and Donna returned to Surfrider Beach for dinner. They bought food from Gremmie's Shake Shack and sat outside on the pier. Plenty of light remained in the sky, and they had a great view of the ocean from their bench. Bandit—the huge teddy bear Donna had won Kelso—could see it, too. She'd told him to leave the bear in the van, but he couldn't leave Bandit alone with that mermaid ghost. It could end up smelling like dead fish.

"I'm gonna have to visit all of California's beaches," he said and stuffed three French fries into his mouth. "The mermaid has gotta like one of 'em."

"For the last time, Kelso, there is no ghost haunting your bus."

"Yeah, there is—and would you call it a van already?"

"Technically, it's a bus. A _Micro_ bus."

"But calling it a bus makes it sound less awesome."

She held up her can of Coke. "I propose a deal. I'll start calling your bus a van ... if you take off its hubcaps tomorrow and find whatever's stinking it up. Because, I swear to God, it has to be coming from the tires."

"Okay," he said and raised his can of 7 Up, "but if a mermaid ghost flies out, and I crap my pants, you're buying me a new pair."

"Deal." She tapped her soda can against his. She took a sip afterward and waited a moment before speaking again. "Thanks, Kelso. Tonight's really been fun. I, like, barely thought about Eric."

"Why would you be thinking about Eric? Casey's the one who dumped you."

She swallowed a bite of hot dog, and her voice lost some of its strength. "Eric dumped me, too—well, more like he rejected me."

"Wait..." He inched closer to her on the bench, unsure if he'd heard her right. " _Eric_ rejected y _ou?_ "

"After your brother acted like a complete jackass, I told Eric we should be together, and he said he didn't want to be my 'second choice'."

He squinted because her words made no sense, and his tongue jabbed the corner of his mouth as he worked through them.

"Kelso—are you choking?"

"No, this is my thinking face."

"Oh."

"Eric's why you ran away," he said slowly.

"Yeah."

He bit off a chunk of hot dog and spoke while chewing. "You doin' it with my brother so fast totally burned him. That's why Eric burned you back."

"I didn't do it with Casey."

"Didja get close?" he said, and her cheeks flushed. He swallowed down his chunk of hot dog, somewhat painfully, and grinned. "You did."

"I don't want to talk about it." She lowered her head, and her hair fell over her face. It blended her in with their surroundings. The sun had begun to set, oranging up the sky and ocean.

" _Close_..." He shook the idea of Donna and his brother from his head. "That's so weird, man. I mean, it took you over a year to give Eric the _big gift_."

Her fingers drummed on the bottom of her Coke can. "I got wrapped up."

He waited for more, but she didn't go into detail. That wasn't unusual between them. Jackie, Eric, and Hyde had the ears she confided in. Kelso's ears were the ones she squeezed when he pissed her off, but they were in California now. How they behaved in Wisconsin didn't have to apply here, and he said, "Were you falling for for my brother?"

She sat back up and sipped her Coke. "I convinced myself I was."

"See, that was your mistake. With the promise ring, Eric tried to get you to make a stronger commitment to him, right?"

"Uh-huh..."

"And you guys broke up 'cause you didn't want to make that kind of commitment yet."

"What are you getting at, Kelso?"

"Instead of taking advantage of your sexual freedom, you ended up in a relationship a few months later."

His logic was sound. It should've inspired her, but she got off the bench and tossed her food into a nearby trashcan. He'd set her off, a talent he was apparently good at. Too bad he couldn't win a prize for it.

She avoided his eyes as she slung her beach bag over her shoulder. He stood up with his backpack and grabbed Bandit, but she strode ahead of him. "No, wait, listen!" he said. Waves were crashing below the pier, and he chased after her. "Donna, when was the last time you were with someone just to fool around?"

She slowed down her pace. "Never."

"You're on the pill. You can do whatever you want with _whoever_ you want. Take your right as a woman, Donna." He pumped his fist into the air. "Women's lib—yeah!"

She kept on walking. He must not have been clear enough.

He darted in front of her, turned around, and walked backward on the pier. It was a tough maneuver with Bandit hugged to his chest. The bear also blocked his sight, but he tucked its fuzzy head beneath his chin. "I'm not saying you should be like Pam Macy," he said. "I'm saying you should try fooling around for fun. No consequences. No pressure."

"Everything has consequences."

She went to the railing and gazed at the darkening shore. Gloom had settled over her again, but he wouldn't give up. Not when they had the whole summer ahead of them.

* * *

Donna's fingers curled over the pier's railing. The waves below broke on the shore, leaving their foamy innards on the sand. Kelso's words slammed against her mind just as relentlessly, depositing questions, only to swallow them up for another go.

"I have to trust the person I'm with," she said.

"Trust?" Kelso leaned against the railing with his giant teddy bear. "You trusted my brother?"

"Again, I got wrapped up." In a fantasy, out of desperation. She'd projected a bunch of ridiculous, ill-fitting ideas onto Casey. His frequent departures had worked in her favor. It was the opposite of Eric's smothering, and Casey had given her the space she'd craved—while cheating on her.

She slapped the railing. How could she have been that naïve?

"So," Kelso said, "how about one kiss?"

"Excuse me?"

"We French for a minute or two, and—"

"No!" she said, even as a smile crept on her lips. She flattened it out. The idea of kissing Kelso was supposed to repulse her, like it always had.

"Donna, we've got a perfect situation here. We're both single."

"Technically, you and Jackie are still together."

He waved dismissively. "What part of, _'We're on a break,'_ don't you get? And it's not like I'd _tell_ her I licked the roof of your mouth."

"Ew." Her stomach clenched. His way with the English language left much to be desired. "You're one of Eric's best friends. I can't do that to him. You can't."

"Sure I can. Never stopped me before. Man, I'd sleep with Eric's mom if Red wouldn't kill me for it. She's a little hottie."

She whacked his arm. "You're a skeevy pig, you know that?"

"Yeah," Kelso said, "but that's what you need right now. Someone who has sex out of joy, not out of love or romance or any of those other girly things."

She pressed herself into the railing as another smile rose to her lips. The sky was on fire with the sunset, and her body started to burn with it. "Why?"

"To loosen up," he said. "To see life doesn't have to be so serious. My motto is: _Never stop amusing yourself_."

"I can't kiss you."

"So I'll kiss you. And you can tell Eric I made you."

She'd flattened out her lips again, but a third smile crawled over them. They were like gnats, these smiles. No matter how many she swatted, others took their place. "What if Jackie kisses Fez this summer while we're here?"

Kelso shrieked, cooling off some of the heat inside her.

"Exactly," she said. "You'd feel betrayed. Your friendship with Fez would be ruined."

"Yeah, but Jackie doesn't kiss for fun. She kisses only when it means something." He hugged his teddy bear, as if he needed comfort. "Like, she kissed the tiny cheese guy out of revenge, to get back at me for sleeping with Laurie. Also, Fez has been after Jackie the last two years. He wants her as his girlfriend."

"Kelso..." A disapproving groan rumbled in her throat, but his arguments weren't completely off-base.

"But if _we_ go at it..." he trapped the teddy bear under his arm, and he snaked the other around her shoulders, "I guarantee it won't mean anything. No mess, no fuss."

The skin of her neck buzzed where his arm made contact. It could've been the start of a sunburn, but she doubted it. "Just fun?"

"Just fun." His fingertips played with the cuff of her sleeve, raising gooseflesh all over her body. "Look, I'm not saying I haven't had a hard-on for you since I was twelve. But if being with Jackie and Laurie's taught me anything, it's to tell a girl from the get-go that I don't want anything serious." His arm slid off her shoulders, and he hugged the teddy bear to his chest again. "Donna, me and my hard-on don't want anything serious from you."

_Nothing serious._ The prescription seemed to fit her ailment perfectly. She'd gotten too serious with Casey, and she and Eric were probably over for good. Maybe he'd take advantage of his own sexual freedom this summer— _damn._

She dug her hands into her scalp and clutched her hair. This was the type of thing she was trying to stop, letting her life be dictated by what Eric was doing or thinking. She wanted to be with him. But even if she committed to him fully, she had no guarantee he'd be okay with her independence. He could be just as controlling as he was before their break-up.

"Give me that," she said and snatched Kelso's teddy bear. She buried her face in its scratchy fur, muffling the chatter of the pier. If she allowed herself to have fun this summer, would Eric understand? Would he get that they were still broken up? Or would he want her even less because she'd become more polluted in his eyes?

She couldn't live in that kind of fear. If they were to have any kind of future together, she had to live freely, with or without him.

"Okay, Kelso..." she put the teddy bear down by her feet, "kiss me."

His eyes widened. "You serious?"

Her pulse tightened, and she swallowed. "No. We're not doing serious, remember?"

"All right!"

His hands glided around her waist, and her heart pumped so hard it throbbed in her stomach. _This was just a kiss,_ she reminded herself, but her arms trembled as they wrapped around his back. His body felt like a combination of Casey's and Eric's. It was both broad-shouldered and skinny, but her thoughts about her exes vanished when Kelso's lips made contact.

The initial kiss was gentle and a little awkward. She didn't do much to help him out. Her mouth was clamped shut, but his tongue teased the line between her lips. The throb in her stomach threw off sparks, and her lips parted.

He deepened the kiss quickly. His fingers snarled in her hair, and he angled her head to get better access to her mouth. Her breath halted. No wonder Jackie'd had a hard time giving him up, but Donna refused to analyze what she was doing, who she was doing it with—or the blessedly distracting anticipation between her legs. It pounded furiously with her heart, and she clutched the front of Kelso's shirt when he withdrew from her.

"Pretty good, huh?" he said and slid his palms over her butt.

"Better than I expected," she said, trying to hide his effect on her. The waves were crashing louder than before, and the sunset rarely looked so vivid.

"So..." A breeze blew across the pier, tousling Kelso's hair. He was waiting for her to make the next move. If Eric had been here instead, this would've been a romantic moment. But with Kelso, it was dirty and wrong … and just what she needed.


	3. Ground Rules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER THREE  
**GROUND RULES**

Donna locked the door to the guest room and dragged Kelso to the bed. He chuckled and said, "Wow, you're really take-charge. I like it—"

"Shut up." She yanked him on top of her and drew his head in for a kiss. The California air was moist, even at night, but she was sweating from more than humidity. Kelso's touches were less clumsy than she'd anticipated. He was such a doofus at life, but a wealth of sexual experience had turned him into Mr. Precision.

His hand slipped beneath her shirt, but her swimsuit proved an impenetrable barrier. "Donna, I can't work this way. I'm an artist."

"Yeah, right." She sat up and took off her shirt. She shoved the swimsuit to her belly button, and her body tensed with her breasts exposed. She waited for him to squeeze them like melons, but his mouth dropped open. "Come on," she said. "You've seen them before."

"I thought it was a dream," he said. "A beautiful, big-boobed dream."

"Huh. You did faint when I flashed you at school."

He reached toward her chest then pulled back. "Now that they're actually in front of me, I don't know if I can touch them."

She tugged on the bed's comforter and suppressed her urge to hit him. Why had he suddenly developed a conscience? "Kelso, you've been copping feels forever."

"Yeah, when you had a shirt on. But now … they've got nipples. They're, like, real."

"Do you want me to put my shirt back on?"

"No." His gaze traveled from her breasts to her face. "You gotta understand something here, Donna. Being with you is like being with a _Playboy Playmate._ I've fantasized about this since I can remember. And you playing hard-to-get all these years made it even hotter."

"I wasn't playing hard-to-get. I was never interested."

"What's the difference?"

Dusk filtered in through the windows, filling the room with a purplish glow. The night was perfect for liberation, but Kelso's compliments chained her to a new set of expectations. She bit into her fingernail and said, "I'm not a porn star, okay? I don't have any sex tricks. I'm very basic in bed, so you'll be disappointed if you think I'm gonna do anything special."

His brow furrowed. "But we're still gonna fool around, right?" She nodded, and his face relaxed. "Then I won't be disappointed."

He finally touched one of her breasts, more gently than Eric had during his first go at it. She lay back on the pillows but kept her eyes open. She had to remain aware of who she was with at all times. Otherwise, the fun would transform into misery.

"You're sure about this?" he said when she guided his head to her chest. His hesitancy was sweet, but he grew in confidence as the minutes passed. His fingers meandered toward her shorts.

She could've ended this any time. _Should have_ ended it, but she let him unbutton her shorts. She kicked them to the floor and spread her knees apart. Her body was vibrating with emotionless pleasure. It was a new experience, and, like an addict, her broken heart craved more.

His hips settled between her thighs, and her breath hitched. His erection pressed through the barrier of their swimsuits. She needed to stop, but as she moved against him, the concept of stopping fell from her consciousness.

* * *

Donna met Kelso in the living room and joined him on the rattan sofa. She was dressed in cotton pajamas, and he wore light sweatpants at her insistence. He'd wanted to sleep in only underwear, but that wasn't going to happen at Mom's house.

She swiped the _TV Guide_ off the coffee table, but summer television didn't offer much in entertainment, even at night. It was mostly news, game shows, and lame movies. She clicked the remote until she found a baseball game, but her gaze lingered on Kelso. He seemed lost in a happy thought. "Man," he said eventually, "I didn't expect that."

"What? For cotton candy and the Tilt-a-Whirl to be a bad combination?"

"No, for you to go that far."

She stared at the TV. The California Angels were playing the Kansas City Royals, and Joe Rudi was rounding third base. "I didn't either."

"How hot were we, huh?"

"Actually..." her body tingled with the recent memory, "pretty freakin' hot."

"I can't believe we did that!" he said, grinning.

She laughed. He was usually so cocky, and his incredulity was endearing. It made her feel like they'd been partners in a bank heist. "Neither can I, but you were right. It was a lot of fun."

He tiptoed two fingers up her thigh. "So I'm gonna bunk in the guest room with you this summer, right?"

"Hell no!" She shoved his hand off her leg. "We've got to set up some ground rules."

"Rules? But I don't like rules."

"Too bad. These rules are important if we want this to be more than a one-time thing."

He crossed his arms over his chest and turned toward the TV. "Fine."

"Okay, the first rule—" She stopped talking. He didn't seem to be paying attention to her. "Kelso, would you look at me?"

"I can watch baseball and listen to your dumb rules at the same time."

"God..." She shut off the TV with the remote. When he complained, she said, "I thought you liked my 'take-charge' attitude."

"Yeah, when you're shoving your tongue down my throat."

"Well, if you ever want me to do that again, you'll start listening to me."

"Fine!" He faced her and uncrossed her arms. "What are your rules?"

"First," she held up a finger, "no sleeping in the same bed." She held up two fingers. "Second, what we do together this summer is between us and only us. No hanky-panky in front of my mom. We can't risk her telling my dad because he'd tell Eric's mom. And _she'd_ tell Eric, who'd tell Jackie."

His features went slack. "Eric would ban me from the basement ... which would totally suck because I really like his basement."

Her eyes narrowed, and she scrutinized his face. Where was his concern about Jackie? He'd cheated on her again. Wasn't he worried about her finding out? Or maybe he no longer took their relationship seriously.

Donna chewed on a nail that had been gnawed at enough. The best thing for Jackie would be to move on, and Donna made a silent promise to help her do that.

"Third," she said, continuing with the rules, "if you have sex with other girls, I don't want to hear about it—and you have to use a condom. I don't wanna catch slut rabies."

"I always use a condom now. That one time I had to go to the free clinic was embarrassing."

Her voice flattened. "You've been to the free clinic?"

"Laurie gave me some kind of rash. Ointment cleared it up, though … wait." He gestured between them. "Are _we_ gonna have sex? You said you didn't even do it with Casey."

She clasped her hands tightly. Her fingers turned red with blood, but the alternative was chewing all her nails off. "I'm re-thinking that part now."

"I've been rash-free for a year!" he said and puffed out his chest. "And Jackie made me get a blood test after we got back together. She wouldn't sleep with me again unless I was disease-free, and I am."

"Thank God." She unclasped her hands and leaned back on the sofa.

"I got real lucky. 'Cause I nailed a lot of chicks after Jackie dumped me."

"Fantastic." She cleared her throat and held up four fingers. "Back to the rules. Fourth, this doesn't mean anything. After the summer, I go back to hurting you if you try to touch me."

"But I can still try to touch you, right?"

"I'd expect nothing less. But when we get back home, I'm gonna do my best to convince Eric he's my first choice."

"But what if he asks you questions, like if you did it with anyone this summer? What if he asks _me_ if you did it with anyone?"

She glanced down at her fingernails. They were bitten down to the quick. Jackie would've wrapped Donna's hands in duct tape as an emergency measure.

 _Jackie._ Donna shut her eyes against a wave of guilt. Thinking about Jackie had become as bad as thinking about Eric. "I'll tell him I had a meaningless fling with a cabana boy," she said. "Not quite the truth, but less than a lie. And that's what you'll tell him, too, if he asks."

"Cool. Cabana boy. Got it. And I'll tell Jackie I slept with a bunch of beach skanks."

"But you _are_ gonna sleep with a bunch of beach skanks."

"Yeah," he said, "but that's all she'll know. Any more rules?"

"The most important one of all," she said. "If I say no, I mean no. Unlike Jackie, I'll kick your ass if you go further than I want."

"Don't have to tell me." He rubbed his shoulder, where she'd punched him multiple times. "My arm still hurts from the drive here."

She smirked; she'd purpled his skin with well-earned bruises. "So, do you have any rules for me?"

"I won't be magnanimous."

"Huh?"

"Magnanimous," he repeated. "You know, sleeping only with you."

"Oh, you mean monogamous. Yeah, we established that."

"'Cause this is my summer of freedom. I just escaped being handcuffed to one girl the rest of my life."

She shuddered. "I don't want to be handcuffed to you, either."

"And you gotta stay on the pill," he said.

"Goes without saying."

"Man, if my condom broke and I got you pregnant," his eyes closed, and he inhaled a shaky breath, "your dad and Red and Hyde would kill me."

"They'd torture you first. Slowly. Painfully. While Eric egged them on to make it even slower and more painful." She smiled wickedly as Kelso swallowed. Of all the concerns she had, getting pregnant with his dimwitted child was not one of them. "Anyway," she slapped her knees and stood up, "I think we covered all the bases."

"No, we've only slid into third."

"Ha, ha. I'm gonna get ready for bed."

She headed for the guest room, skin hot with the prospect of sleeping with Kelso and the potential consequences. But this was her summer of freedom, too. If Eric couldn't understand what that meant, then they didn't have a chance.


	4. Totally Magnanimous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER FOUR  
**TOTALLY MAGNANIMOUS**

The California sun was magic; Kelso would bet money on it. After less than a month under its rays, his concept of Donna had completely changed. He thought they'd progress slowly or that she'd cut him off entirely. But by the end of their first week in Malibu, they'd had sex.

His enjoyment of it was off the charts, _all_ the charts, like statistical analysis ones he'd never understand. But the sun's magic had also melted his brain. She was Eric's girl. Kelso couldn't escape that fact anymore, and as she slid herself onto him the first time, Eric popped into his head like Jiminy Cricket: " _How could you do this to me, man? First my sister, now my girlfriend?_ "

Kelso worked hard to give Donna most of his attention, but he'd argued with Cricket-Eric in his mind: " _You could've had her this summer, but you were stupid and pushed her away. It's your own fault. Anyway, it's temporary. You'll have her back in two months._ "

The debate went on silently, but as Donna's rhythm over his hips strengthened, he blurted, "You better appreciate her!"

She slowed down and laughed. "What?"

"Y—your leg muscles." His grip on her waist tightened, and he urged her to speed back up. "You sure know how to use them—" His voice cracked, and he cringed . He sounded like Fez, but he couldn't help himself. "And I appreciate that."

"Okay..."

He didn't interrupt her again and, despite Cricket-Eric's squeaks of indignance, was rewarded with an intense release. Donna seemed to have a similar experience. She made noises he'd never heard from her before. They were quiet but, combined with how her fingers dug into his shoulders, confirmed his prowess. If she'd been faking, she would've been a lot louder about it—and they wouldn't have fooled around every day since, often more than once.

He had no time to go after other chicks and barely any time to look at them. He and Donna hung out at Surfrider Beach and made-out. She jerked him off on the Ferris wheel at San Polo's amusement park. They saw movies together and fucked on the sticky floor, and Cricket-Eric eventually shut up about it.

Kelso woke each morning with a smile and a boner. Driving Donna to California might've been his best idea ever. Sex wasn't in short supply, and neither was cash. He'd saved a bunch from modeling. His boss, Mr. Halverson, had given him the summer off, and Donna had dough from her WFPP job, too. All that money meant freedom, but they also had plenty of time to screw in the house.

Midge's waitress job and acting auditions kept her super busy. She was out now, working at the restaurant. Kelso and Donna had finished dinner and were watching TV in the living room … sort of watching. Summer programming blew except for baseball. Donna clicked through channels using the remote, and he yawned when she put on the news. He was liable to fall asleep in Midge's comfy armchair.

"Bored?" Donna said.

"Who wants to hear about California state taxes? I'm never gonna have to pay any."

"I have an idea. Hold on." She got off the sofa and searched a bookshelf against the wall. She plucked a deck of cards from a ceramic bowl, tossed it onto the coffee table. "I'll be back in a sec," she said and disappeared into the kitchen. She returned with two six-packs of beer. "Boozy strip poker."

He grinned and joined her on the sofa. A small radio was on the coffee table, and he simultaneously turned it on while clicking off the TV. He tuned the radio until David Bowie's "Fame" played from the speaker. Not the most rocking song but better than the news.

"Each time one of us wins a hand," Donna said, "the loser has to take off a piece of clothing. But the _winner_ has to drink a beer."

"Cool."

She mixed the cards and dealt them. The first hand was all hers; she won with two pair. "Strip," she said and opened a can of beer. She guzzled it down as Kelso pulled off his left sock. A loud belch signaled that she'd finished.

He shuffled the cards for the second hand, but she won it with a flush. "Damn it!" he said and yanked off his right sock. Donna drank her second beer.

Their third hand led to her third consecutive win and beer. "New rule," she said, "'cause you suck at this game: you gotta take off two things at once, and I'm gonna drink half the beer. Otherwise, I'll pass out before we can do anything."

"I got a better idea." He cracked open a beer and downed it without pausing. He drank two more while she laughed. "Okay," he said and wiped his mouth, "you take off three things."

"That's cheating, you know." She grasped the hem of her T-shirt. "But we're both a bunch of cheaters, so I guess it's fine."

He flinched but wasn't sure why. She said nothing more and pulled off her shirt, unhooked her bra, and slid off one of her socks. His own shirt was off, and his jumbled thoughts disappeared when she fit his palms over her breasts. He didn't question her. Their relationship had progressed beyond hesitation, and they ended up having a quick, drunken lay on the sofa.

"Oh, no," she said once he pulled out of her. "You're not … you're..."

"Wha—?" He glanced down at himself. He'd forgotten to wear a condom. "Damn!"

He stumbled into the hallway, to the bathroom, and cleaned himself up. Donna wasn't in the living room when he returned. She must've gone to her mother's private bathroom. He wiped off the sofa in the meantime, turned around one of the cushions. Then he tossed the beer cans and put the playing cards back in their box.

"I'm gonna get slut rabies!" Donna said from the hallway. "I gotta get a blood test!"

"Naw." He sauntered over to her and tried to cup her shoulders, but she shied away from him. "You're the only one I've done it with so far."

Her eyes were glassy, either from fear or from alcohol. "N'uh-uh. You must've been with some beach sluts by now."

"When? I've had no time. I've been, like, totally magnanimous. Not on purpose, but..."

She covered her mouth, and a sigh puffed through her fingers. "Thank God. No more beery, boozy sex."

"Whatever you say, Big Red." He snaked his arm around her shoulders and hugged her sideways. "It was fun, though."

Her expression brightened. "Yeah."

She went into her room, and he set up his blanket and pillows on the sofa. Drunken sex with her had been great, but something she'd said beforehand whirred in his ears: " _We're both a bunch of cheaters._ "

Did she really consider what they were doing cheating? She was single, and he and Jackie were definitely over, at least for the summer. He'd gotten a letter from her a few days ago—she must've gotten the address from Bob—and it began with, " _Dear cowardly, won't-marry-me loser, run-away-to-California jackass_."

The letter only got worse from there and ended with her dumping him. It had to be a temporary thing, though. Just like his romp with Donna was temporary. All would go back to normal once they returned home. _Better_ than normal.

He clicked on the TV and lay down on the sofa. Jackie had to be lost without him, the poor kid. When he got back, she'd accept whatever kind of relationship he could give her. Fez just better have kept his hands off her.

* * *

Donna tried to make-out with Kelso at Gremmie's Shake Shack, but she did little more than let Kelso nibble on her neck. She'd woken up this morning with a dull ache in her chest. Once she ruled out a heart attack, the pain of missing Eric took over her whole body. She'd dialed up the Formans without getting out of bed. Mrs. Forman picked up and said, "Donna? It's you! How's California? Have you met Johnny Carson yet?"

Donna's eyes shut in response. Seven weeks away, and Mrs. Forman had gone completely loopy, but Donna said, "Is Eric mad? You know, that I just left without saying anything? Maybe he doesn't wanna talk to me."

"Oh, no, no," Mrs. Forman said. "I know he wants to talk to you. He hasn't heard from you all summer."

Her answer had sent both joy and guilt into Donna's stomach, and pressure squeezed her heart as Mrs. Forman went to get Eric. Two minutes later, Mrs. Forman picked up the phone again and apologized. Eric was busy in the bathroom. Donna didn't want to know what that meant, but she gave Mrs. Forman her phone number.

"Donna," Kelso said now, jostling her, "you wanna get into this a little? Feels like I'm Frenching a mannequin."

"Sorry. I sat at the house for three hours..." Her chocolate shake was half-empty. She considered drinking the rest, but she left the cup alone. "Eric still hasn't called."

Kelso stopped kissing her neck. "We've got less than two weeks left here. Don't waste them … 'cause I'm not." He picked up his strawberry shake and gestured toward the order window. Standing in line was a blond, whose swimsuit barely covered her generous chest. "That's Annette," he said. "Yeah, I hit on her at the beach while you were waiting for Eric. I'm gonna wear her down."

"That's great," Donna said flatly and leaned back in her chair.

"Don't tell me you're jealous."

A strand of hair had fallen over her face; she blew at it in vain. "No. I just miss Eric."

"Good 'cause we have rules."

"Two of which we've already broken.".

"Hey!" he said and sloshed his strawberry shake at her. "The no-condom thing was both our faults. And I'm not trying to be magnanimous, but you never go away."

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Excuse me?"

"I just mean why should I work hard for these California girls when I got a hot chick who's always willing to put out? And you're not only hot," he shook his head, as if he couldn't believe what he was about to say, "you're, like, really good at doin' it. No wonder Eric never cheated on you."

Her face flushed, and she looked down at her sandaled feet. Kelso's flattery had succeeded again, made her feel wanted. Eric could have—at any point this summer—gotten her phone number in California from Dad. Or gotten the address, like Jackie had, and written her a letter. But he hadn't, and if he didn't call her by the end of the day, she'd know for sure he didn't want her back. Ever.

"I have a proposal," Kelso said with faux innocence. "You make out with me all hot n' heavy. Then Annette'll see how great a kisser I am, and she'll want a piece of the action."

She should've been insulted, but she laughed. "Maybe she goes the other way. Maybe she'll want a piece of _my_ action."

"You think? Man, that'd be awesome! I'd love to see you two French."

"Of course you would." She pointed at a tan, well-muscled man standing at the food counter. "And I'd like to see you feel him up."

"Whoa." Kelso put up his hands. "Okay, no more talk about me touching another dude. The only people worth touching are chicks."

She dragged in a breath through her nose. He'd just burned himself without realizing it, a habit he couldn't seem to break. "Anyway," she said, "is there any universe in which you could see yourself being 'magnanimous' to one woman for the rest of your life?"

He squinted, and his tongue darted to the corner of his mouth. If he'd been anyone else, she would've been worried, but that was his thinking face. "I don't know," he said. "Probably not for a really long time. Me and Jackie tried it, and being magnanimous comes with a lot of responsibility and pain." He drummed his fingers on the table. "If you haven't guessed by now, I don't like either responsibility or pain."

She nodded and snatched her chocolate shake. "If Eric and I don't get back together, I'm not going to worry about relationships anymore. At least, not for a while." She pulled her straw partially out of the shake cup then shoved it back in. "Something I've learned this year ... I'm a lot more like my parents than I thought."

"You're a nudist?"

"No, but I can separate sex from love."

She frowned. Saying it aloud made it real. She'd always held sex to a high standard, needing it to be about about loving someone through her body. Her parents had used sex in all kinds of ways—to relieve boredom, as a weapon, as an apology—but rarely, if ever, to express love. She'd fought desperately to be different than them, going slowly with Eric and frustrating him whenever fear took over.

But her illusions had disintegrated. During this summer with Kelso, she'd used her body to enjoy herself on the most superficial of levels. It had helped her to stop thinking, but it also left her feeling empty.

"You're wrong, Donna." He took her hand in a surprising act of tenderness. "You can't separate it. You thought Casey loved you. I heard it through the Formans' kitchen door."

"Fantastic." The back of her neck heated up, and she pressed her knees together beneath the table. She really had been humiliated in front of the whole world, but she didn't release Kelso's hand.

"And I love you," he said with no hint of insincerity. "Not, like, will-you-marry-me-and-nag-me-to-death love. But you're-my-hot-friend-who-I-get-to-do-it-with love."

The corners of her mouth twitched up, a flicker of a smile. "Thanks, Kelso." She squeezed his hand, finally understanding why Jackie had fallen in love with him. He could be a real sweetie-pie. A horny, cheating sweetie-pie, but a sweetie-pie nonetheless.

* * *

The next day, Donna and Kelso went to Surfrider Beach together. They'd separated for a little while, but he eventually met her at their usual spot. She acknowledged him with a barely-spoken, "Hey." She must've sounded pitiful and probably looked worse.

She hadn't bothered to lay out a towel or put on a swimsuit. She was wearing a tank top and a pair of jeans, rolled up to her knees. Her hair was clean but uncombed, and her fingertips were red and raw. She barely had any nails left to bite, but her teeth bit into her thumbnail as waves broke on the shore.

Eric never called. The phone had rung last night and this morning but not for her.

Mrs. Forman must've misunderstood his desire to talk. Someone who was eager to reconnect would've called immediately. Maybe he'd intended to tell Donna he'd moved on, to do her a courtesy by telling her about _Linda_ or _Dianne—_ or whatever his current girlfriend's name was—before declaring his newfound love to the world.

She opened her mouth to ask Kelso about it, but his attention was squarely focused on Annette. He'd struck out with her a few minutes ago, and she'd gone into the surf to "cool off".

"You're pushing her too hard," Donna said.

"What?" he said distractedly. He was stretched out on his towel, stomach-side down. He and Donna had an unobstructed view of Annette, who was pouring a pail of seawater over her head.

"She's a virgin," Donna reminded him, not for the first time. "If you want to get beyond making out with her, try something a little less intense than sex. Like, go for her breasts. They're both so out there I'm surprised you haven't 'accidentally' brushed against them."

"I have, but I wanna do her!"

He was whining, and she struggled not to do the same. "Well, Annette wants something else, just like Eric does. He didn't call me, so … I guess we're really over."

Her gaze drifted from Annette to a group of surfers. They'd stuck their boards in the sand, but one of them seemed to be without a board. His back was to her, but his haircut was familiar, as was his short-sleeve shirt.

"I don't think my mind's handling the end too well," she said, though Kelso likely wasn't listening. "One of those surfers looks like Eric. I'm probably gonna see him everywhere this week."

The Eric-surfer turned away from his group. She caught a glimpse of his face, and breath-choking waves crashed against her throat. That guy didn't just look like Eric.

He _was_ Eric.


	5. Returns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER FIVE  
**RETURNS**

"Eric!" Donna said and raced across the beach. Kelso thought she'd gone bananas, but a scrawny guy—who did look a lot like Eric—ran toward her, too.

Everything slowed down inside Kelso's mind. Had Eric come here? By the desperate way the guy yelled her name, who else could he be? But if Donna touched him, Kelso's summer was over.

Kelso leapt to his feet and chased after her. She was inches away from Eric, from destroying Kelso's last week of California happiness. Kelso pushed off his toes and soared into the air. His body collided with Donna's, and they tumbled to the hot sand.

"Kelso," Eric shouted, "what are you doing?"

"Winning!" Kelso slid his hand beneath Donna's tank top. He tried to squeeze her breast, but she wriggled free and kicked him in the butt. The blow sent him flying. His stomach landed first, shoving the air from his lungs. For all the times Red had threatened to put a foot up his Kelso's ass, Kelso never imagined Donna would be the one who actually did it.

He gasped for breath. The breaking waves deafened him, or maybe it was his pounding heart. He laid his cheek on the sand and eyed the shoreline. It was a graveyard for barnacles, scallops, and nautiluses, but his joy wouldn't die here. He slammed his fist into a pile of broken shells and pushed himself up. A minute ago, Donna would've welcomed his hand on her boob. Now she gazed at Eric in silence, all lovey-dovey.

Kelso's impulse was to tackle her again, but he walked off instead. He searched for Annette, but she was no longer frolicking in the surf. She'd probably gone to Gremmie's, and he headed for the pier.

* * *

Donna had trouble speaking. Standing before Eric was like dream, but it twisted into a nightmare with one thought: she'd slept with Kelso all summer.

"I can't..." her eyes flicked toward the waves, "I can't believe you came here for me."

"Of course I did, Donna," he said gently, and it brought her gaze back to him. "I love you, and I have so much to say but I ju—"

Her arms wrapped around his neck— _he loved her_ —and she kissed him before her own truth spilled out. His hands held her firmly, reassuringly. His lips were warm and tasted like home, a place gone missing from her map over a year ago.

She cupped the back of his head, praying their kiss would never end, but she also put herself on trial. The verdict was guilt, no matter how she tried to rationalize it away. The sentence was honesty, regardless of the consequences. It drove her to pull away from his mouth.

"Eric," she said and knotted her hands at the small of his back, "I love you. God, I can't even tell you how much, and I want to be with you. Not just now but in the future, too. Like, _way_ in the future."

He smiled, and his happiness broke her heart all over again. What she had to say next would erode that smile, maybe permanently. "But I..." She sucked in a breath, and the salty air stung her throat. "But I don't know if you'll still want to be with me after what—"

"Donna," his palms glided up to her waist and down to her hips, "about Casey and all that stuff? I don't care, okay? I just wanna be with you."

Her shoulders grew heavy, despite that her heart floated in inside her. He'd let go of what kept them apart this summer. He'd let go of the last, horrible year. "Eric..." Her voice thinned. "Eric, we..."

His eyebrows drew together. "What is it? You can tell me anything."

"We were still broken up this summer..."

"Were you—" he swallowed, "were you with someone else? Here?"

"I thought you didn't want me," heat crept up her neck, "so I, um … I tried to forget."

His chest rose with a shaky breath, but he pulled her closer to him. "It's okay."

She stared at his green eyes, but tears clouded her vision. She blinked them away, hoping he wouldn't think she was manipulating him. That was Jackie's angle, not hers.

"I mean..." he swallowed again, "what you had with whoever is over, right? Or it will be now that—"

"No, it's over," she managed to say. " _So_ over."

"And it was only with _one_ other person?"

"Yes, but—"

His smile reappeared. "I still don't care. Donna, I went out on a few dates myself this summer, with the girl who sells Slurpees at the movie theater. We, uh ... rounded a few bases—"

Her stomach tensed. Her first instinct was to ask how many bases. Her second was to ask what _selling Slurpees_ actually meant, but the answers didn't matter. He'd journeyed across the country for her, probably in defiance of his parents. It was something he wouldn't have done for that Slurpee girl.

"But I couldn't drown my sorrows in dating or in frosty beverages," he continued, "because I never fell out of love with you. I don't think I ever will."

Donna's tears dotted the sand. She couldn't stop them. Too many conflicting emotions were battling for supremacy. Eric touched her wet cheek, and she blubbered, "God, I love you so much," before kissing him again.

His grip tightened on her back. She craved the security he was offering, but she hadn't earned it. Not yet. She withdrew from him and shivered, despite the hot sun overhead. Her toes dug into the sand, and she forced herself to speak. "It was Kelso."

"What was Kelso?"

"Who I was with this summer."

"I know. He drove you here."

"No," she said. "I was _with_ Kelso."

His spine straightened, and every muscle in his body seemed to twitch. "Kelso? You—you—you and Kelso?"

She nodded.

"How much did you—" His hands fell from her body. "How much did you and he do?"

"All of it."

His eyes grew round. "No." She nodded again, and he stumbled backward, as if she'd transformed into a giant spider. "How many times?" he said.

"Don't do this, Eric."

"Kelso..." He took another step back. "You slept with Kelso all freaking summer?"

Her stomach began to hurt. She'd betrayed Jackie, and now she'd betrayed Kelso by breaking one of their rules. The identity of her fling was supposed to remain a secret, but the pain she'd caused Eric eclipsed everything else;.

"He's one of my oldest friends!" he said. "Donna, how could you?"

"I know! But after how horrible Casey was, and after you rejected me, I needed to be with someone I trusted."

"And you trust Kelso? The guy who puts his dipstick into any engine he finds? God, Donna! Did you at least use protection?"

"Of course!" But that wasn't the whole truth, and she fixed her gaze on the breakers. Hurling herself into the ocean and drowning had to be a less excruciating experience than this. "Except for once," she said, unable to look Eric in the face. "Kelso and I were both drunk, but Jackie had him tested for STDs. And he was magnanimous—I mean, _monogamous—_ to me."

"He was monogamous." Eric started to laugh, a sickening, joyless laugh. "You think _he_ was monogamous. Michael If-It-Has-a-Hole-I'm-There Kelso."

Her fingers curled into fists. "He had no time to be with anyone else. We spent pretty much every second together—"

"Oh, and that makes it so much better." He turned his back on her but stayed put.

"Eric, I'm sorry—but I'm also not sorry."

He whipped around, kicking up sand and broken shells. "What?"

"I have no romantic feelings for Kelso whatsoever. I used him, and he used me. He even thinks he's getting back together with Jackie when we get home. And right now, he's trying to get into the swimsuit of a dumb blond he met last week."

"So it's really nothing?"

She took a step toward him. "It's nothing."

His features relaxed, only to tense up moments later. She'd witnessed this phenomenon in him before, his emotions ebbing and flowing like the tide. He was struggling to reconcile the irreconcilable, and she said, "If you can't forgive me—"

"I can," he said, "though I really wish you'd picked, like, that guy," he pointed to a tan surfer, "instead of one of my friends. Because I won't be able to look at him anymore without wanting to kick his face in."

"If you forgive me, you have to forgive him, too," she said. "We were both equal partners in this."

"Who's idea was it?"

"His, but I—"

"I knew it! Where the hell did he go?" He searched the shoreline, weaving between children and half-wrecked sandcastles. "There!" he said and bolted for the pier.

"Eric!" Donna darted across the beach. She'd gotten used to running on the sand, and she caught up with him quickly. "Eric, please! I know you're pissed, but—"

He stopped suddenly, and she ran past him. She had to backtrack, and he waited to speak until they were face-to-face again. "Okay," he said, "what if I'd slept with Jackie this summer, huh?"

"But you wouldn't. You can't stand her."

"Not the point, Donna!" Beads of sweat dripped off his forehead, and his skin was reddening. "What if I got over the fact she repulses me, and she and I had hot, sticky sex all over the basement?"

She pressed her lips together. The idea of him and Jackie rolling around the basement was ridiculous. "That would be like Hyde and Jackie sleeping together. It just can't happen."

"Just like I thought you and Kelso couldn't happen! He hit on you all the time, and you always beat him up. What changed?"

"I thought I lost you."

He wiped sweat from his forehead, and the hardness in his eyes softened. "If I had slept with—okay, not Jackie—but someone you know, someone more realistic like … _Shelly_ this summer, how would you feel?"

"Horrible, and I never expected you to be okay with this. But I respected you—and our relationship—enough to tell you the truth right away." She raised a hand to her mouth, intending to chomp on her thumbnail, but she forced her hand back down. "I love you enough to risk everything so you can make an informed choice about us."

"You didn't fall in love with Kelso?"

"Hell no!"

"Okay," he said, as if he'd made some kind of decision.

"Okay?"

"It took me a summer without you—and of my parents yelling at me—to realize this." He entwined their fingers together. "But I know your heart, Donna. I know I was never your second choice."

"You weren't. You're not."

"And when you're in pain, you do stupid things."

She laughed. "I really do."

"And so do I." He kissed the back of her hand and kept it by his lips. "I mean, think about all the crap I pulled that got us here." She gave him a confused look, and he said. "I became Grand Moff Tarkin."

His clarification didn't help. "Is that a _Batman_ reference?"

" _Star Wars._. Princess Leia warned Grand Moff Tarkin—never mind. I tightened my grip on you too much, and we broke up."

"But I didn't exactly make you feel secure, did I?" She cupped her cheek, and her skin burned against her palm. She needed more sunscreen, but she'd forgotten her beach bag at Mom's. "I left you waiting for me at the Ted Nugent concert for over an hour. That was really bad, and I never apologized."

"Yeah, we both messed up, so..." his arms glided around her back, and he pulled her against his body, "how about no more apologies? For, you know, the past."

She slid her chin over his shoulder. "That sounds great."

They held each other for a while, and when they parted, his smile finally returned. "Because we're both bound to screw up again, but at least we're wiser now. And if you see a future with me—"

"I do," she said. "No one makes me feel the way you do."

"That's good because I won't—" his voice caught, "I _can't_ lose you again. And I swear to you, Donna, I'll do everything I can to make us work."

"Me, too." Her fingers slipped into his hair and drew his face closer. "It'll probably involve a lot more talking."

"We've done a pretty good job of it today." His breath heated her lips as he spoke, and they tingled, anticipating his kiss. "It'll involve a lot more of our mouths altogether."

"Yes, yes," she said, and the remaining distance between them vanished.


	6. Consequences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER SIX  
**CONSEQUENCES**

Kelso found Annette—and success—at Gremmie's Shake Shack. He'd bought her a pineapple shake, and that sweetened her enough to make out with him. They were sitting at a table in the corner, under a painting of palm trees. Annette's giant breasts pushed up against his chest, but they reminded him of Donna's equally impressive rack. So much so that he imagined hearing Donna's voice rise above the chatter of Gremmie's: "This is a bad idea."

Kelso opened one eye, just in case his imagination wasn't to blame, but Annette's smooth forehead filled his vision. He couldn't see anything else, and Eric's voice seemed to seep out of her pores: "Wow, Kelso. You work fast."

"Eric, don't," Donna's voice said, and Kelso pulled free of Annette's face. His pulse sped up because Donna and Eric had materialized in front of the table— _incredible._ Freeing that mermaid's ghost must've granted him magical powers. He'd imagined Donna, and Donna appeared, though not alone.

Annette pointed at Eric. "Michael, who's that?"

"Donna's boyfriend..." Kelso said, meeting Donna's eyes, "right?"

"Yeah," Eric said, "not that it seemed to matter to you."

Donna clutched Eric's arm and nodded towards the food counter. "Let's get something to eat, okay?"

"In a minute." Eric jabbed his fingers into Kelso's shoulder. "I know the dirty things you did with my lady—"

"I'm not your lady," Annette said then turned to Kelso. "Michael, you told me you took a shower this morning."

"Not you," Eric said. " _Donna._ "

Kelso glared at Donna as his ears grew hot. "You told him?" He shot to his feet, jostling the table with his knee "We had a pact!"

Donna's gaze sank to the floor, but Eric said, "Of course she told me. And after we get back home, you're banned from the basement."

Panic rose in Kelso's throat. "Wha—?"

"Eric!" Donna said.

"He broke the code, Donna." Eric frogged Kelso in the arm. "You broke the code, man!"

"I was only borrowing her!"

"I'm getting bored, Michael," Annette said. "Can you tell your friends to _go away?_ "

"Yeah. Go away!" Kelso sat down again and cupped Annette's knee beneath the table.

"No!" Eric frogged him a second time, but unlike Donna's punches, Eric's didn't hurt. "You broke the code! You know how many times you threatened Fez for wanting to do the same thing? He could be 'borrowing' Jackie right now."

Kelso shook his head. "But that's different!"

"Who's Jackie?" Annette said.

"Uh..." Kelso looked up at the painting of palm trees for a good answer, "Jackie was my plant. She died in a Big-Wheel accident. I still have a piece of her pot..." He pretended to sniffle and snatched a napkin from the table. "I hug it to my chest and cry over her every night." He dabbed his uncrying eyes with the napkin. "Yeah, I'm sensitive."

"No," Eric said, "I mean Jackie, _his ex-girlfriend._ "

"Also dead," Kelso said.

Eric's hands clasped together in prayer. "How I wish, but she's alive and well—"

"In our memories." Kelso reaffirmed his grip on Annette's knee, but she pried him off.

"What's going on here?" she said. "Why are you lying to me?"

"I'm not lying, Jackie—uh, Donna—uh, _Annette!_ The—look, baby..." Kelso tried to kiss her, but she shoved him away. "Great, Eric. Look at what you did!"

"That's just the beginning," Eric said. "Wait 'til Red finds out—"

"No!" Kelso and Donna both shouted.

" _Eric,_ " Donna said warningly, "your dad'll kill him and never let me in your house again."

Eric slapped his forehead. "Damn. I forgot you were part of this."

"Come on." She dragged Eric to the food counter, and Kelso glowered at their backs. He was losing, and he hated losing. Donna had broken their pact. Eric banned him from the basement, and Annette wasn't putting out. The end of the summer was supposed to rock, but it didn't rock at all.

* * *

A sky full of stars glittered down on Eric and Donna. They'd rolled back the roof tarp of Kelso's van and made love to the sound of crickets. Eric feared visions of Kelso would creep into his head, but Donna's love lit all the dark caverns of his skull. Her feelings for him blazed through her body like a million candles, and his shone just as brightly for her.

"I was so scared I'd never be like this with you again," she said afterward, resting her head on his bare shoulder. They'd borrowed a blanket from Midge, and it kept their bodies warm. "I mean, after last year, after this summer—"

"Donna, about Casey and Kelso..." he draped his arm protectively around her waist, "I understand, okay? You were vulnerable, and you didn't know what else to do."

"I really didn't." She slid her hand over his stomach, and her next words echoed his own thoughts. "I've never hated a summer more, but now that you're here, it's, like, amazing. This is the most romantic night of my whole life." She sat up and looked at him. "I still can't believe you came here for me. You defied Red. You risked being stranded in California—"

"Jesus, Donna..." He sat up and cupped the side of her face. "I'd infiltrate the Death Star to get you back. Like Luke did for Leia."

Her wet eyes grew wide, but no tears fell. "Wow. A _Star Wars_ reference I actually like."

"Finally." He laughed and stroked her cheek. Nothing had ever felt as good as this moment, except... "I've got sand in my crack."

"Me, too." Her fingers brushed through his hair, and her expression became somber. "Eric, I wanna go home."

"So we'll go home. First thing tomorrow." He bent his head toward her, and their lips touched. His body tensed in anticipation of a deeper kiss, but the van's door slammed open. Kelso's face appeared, painted orange and black. He looked like the Frosted Flakes mascot, Tony the Tiger.

"Kelso?" Donna said and pulled the blanket tighter around her body. .

"How was your date with Annette?" Eric said, unable to keep the scorn from his voice. Kelso, however, didn't seem to notice.

"We went to a carnival." Kelso held up a balloon animal attached to a stick. "I won her six stuffed animals, and then we shared a giant pretzel. And then I walked her home, and she gave me a good night kiss—on the cheek." His eyes flicked to Donna. "You know, in Wisconsin, if you win a girl a giant, purple rhinoceros, she puts out!"

He tossed the balloon animal into the van, and it narrowly missed Eric's head. Kelso had probably aimed at him on purpose. "Watch it," Eric said, but Kelso stomped inside the van, shut the door, and got into the driver's seat.

"This has to be Annette's revenge on me!" Kelso shouted and started up the engine. "And you two, I'm going for a drive to cool off. So unless you wanna come along, get out!"

"Hey!" Donna stood up with the blanket and wrapped it completely around herself. She marched up to the driver's seat without a glance back at Eric. In her fury, she'd clearly forgotten he was as nude as she was. He rushed to put on his clothes, but better Kelso see him naked than see her that way … again.

"Kelso, you're not driving anywhere tonight!" she said, and the van stopped rumbling. She must've yanked his key out of the ignition. "Eric and I want to go home tomorrow, so get a good night's sleep."

"Fine," Kelso said, "but this is still my van, and you and Eric are banned from touching each other in it."

Eric had pulled on his pants, but his shirt was only half-buttoned when he went to the driver's seat. "You have a Microbus," he whispered in Kelso's ear. "And I'm not talking about your vehicle. I'm talking about what's in your shorts. Donna told me."

Kelso half-groaned, half-screamed, and he mashed his forehead against the steering wheel. Eric and Donna left him that way, but the burn was based on a lie. Donna had said nothing about Kelso's nether regions, and Eric would never ask. But as far as he was concerned, his friendship with Kelso was over.

* * *

The next morning, as Kelso drove onto the interstate, Eric and Donna had a quiet, private conversation at the back of the van.

"Eric," she said, "what happened this summer has to stay between us."

"Yeah … I don't know if I can do that." He glanced out the window, and his eyes fixed on Mt. Baldy. Its rocky peak rose high above the San Bernardino Valley. Getting their lives back to normal would be as tough as climbing that mountain without a rope. "How can I watch Kelso having fun with Fez and Hyde while his betrayal of me goes unpunished?"

"You banned him from the basement, so you won't be seeing it."

"But I'll hear about it, about _him_." He was tempted to bite his nails, chewing them down to nubs, just as Donna had done to hers this summer. But he clasped his hands together instead and cracked his knuckles.

"If this gets out," she said, "if Jackie learns what I did, she'll disown me. I broke the Sister Code."

"Oh, Donna," he said and cupped her shoulder, "girls don't have a code."

She shrugged off his hand. "Yeah, we do. If Jackie slept with you, I don't know if I could forgive her."

"But that's silly. We've already established that I'd never sleep with Jackie."

She chuckled and covered her mouth, but her laughter subsided when she spoke again. "Seriously, Eric, she can't find out about this. And you can't ban Kelso from the basement, either. It'll tear our group apart." She pointed toward the driver's seat and twirled her finger around Kelso's small head. "You think Hyde or Jackie—or _Fez—_ won't try to find out why Kelso can't hang out with us anymore? And, honestly, I should be banned, too."

Eric's stomach clenched. She kept reminding him of her part in this situation, but he viewed summer-Donna and current-Donna as two different people. Summer-Donna had acted out of pain. Current-Donna was his Donna, but he sighed at her self-accountability. He both admired it and resented it.

"Okay. Yeah … all right," he said and swept his fingertips up her arm. "Kelso's unbanned. I'll just be really, _really_ passive-aggressive toward him."

She grasped his hand and pressed it against her cheek. "That works for me."

"It works for me, too!" Kelso shouted from the driver's seat. "It's what I'd do if Fez slept with Jackie!"

She looked down at her feet and laughed. Eric, though, stared through the window again. Her obvious fondness for Kelso rattled his ribs, but as he'd learned from losing her, chaos and conflicting emotions were part of life.

"It's gonna be a mess when we get back home," she said.

The muscles in his back tightened. He rolled his shoulders in effort to loosen up the knots. He'd wanted his relationship with Donna to be neat and clean, to go in an orderly straight line: love, sex, marriage, kids, but that simply wasn't reality.

"I know," he said and drew her into a one-armed hug. He didn't need cleanliness anymore or order. He just needed Donna.


	7. Really Dirty and Really Wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER SEVEN  
**REALLY DIRTY AND REALLY WRONG**

Jackie giggled into Steven's bare shoulder. He was kissing her neck, pressing heat into her skin, and the short hairs of his beard tickled her. Getting lost in the moment would've been easy, but she opened one eye. Light from the basement filtered into his room. The crack beneath his door was bright; no shadows lurked. They were alone down here.

Her fingers slid into his curly hair. It was unbelievably soft, just as his kisses were tender. He'd probably take his time today if he could, but their predicament called for speed. His arms tightened on her back, and he picked her up.

A thrill shuddered through her body. Being naked with him was like being crowned Snow Prom Queen or winning Miss Dairy Princess, only it wasn't a dream. It was actually happening.

He met her eyes as her legs locked around his waist.. He was smiling, and her heart cartwheeled. No one had ever affected her as much with a smile, but she did her best to hide it. He was cocky enough.

"You're cool with this, right?" he said, supporting her back with one arm. He snatched a condom from his dresser, and she blindly helped him put it on. "You're so light it could actually work."

She was more than ready to try this new position with him. "Steven, shut up and go."

He entered her deftly, without any of Michael's clumsiness. Her breath caught at his deeper presence inside her, but bliss cascaded across every nerve. He seemed to anticipate her every move, blurring the divide between their bodies. She grasped the back of his hair, shut her eyes against his cheek as she hurtled toward delirium. His physical awareness of her was still unnerving, still somewhat unfamiliar, but after today she might not get another chance to get used to it.

Eric, Donna, and Michael were on their way home.

Eric had called Steven fifteen minutes ago from Northbrook, less than an hour from Point Place, and Jackie's pulse had tightened at the information. The basement would become a madhouse if they found out her and Steven's secret … their really dirty and really wrong secret.

They'd spent the last six weeks sneaking around, touching each other whenever—and wherever—they could. She hadn't planned on having sex with him, to go that far. But after nearly a month of fooling around, her body ached for more. Her heart suffered from the same calamity, but he hadn't claimed any emotional connection, and neither did she.

A film of sweat formed on their skin. They'd both become slippery, and her fingers laced over the nape of his neck. The August humidity tended to gather in his room, but it didn't interfere with their intimacy. His eyes were open and focused on her face. They seemed full of appreciation, but of what kind?

" _Fuck,_ " he said, "I hate rushin' like this." His movements had grown faster. His fingers dug into her hips as pressure built up between her thighs and, unwelcomely, inside her chest.

Their friends were almost home, but he probably didn't care. He rarely had trouble finding girls to sleep with, and she was just another notch on his belt. She was supposed to be okay with that. He'd warned her he didn't do attachments, and she'd given him a warning back: _"After Michael, the last thing I want is to be attached."_

The truth, however, scraped her brain, and she grew out of sync with his rhythm. Color had to be draining from her face, giving her a Pinciotti-like paleness.

"Jackie—crap." He adjusted his stance. His muscles visibly strained as he attempted to bring her back into his groove. "You come already?"

Droplets of sweat sparkled in his eyelashes and in his beard. She forced her gaze to the dusty suitcases against the wall. "No, I..."

"What?"

"Is this it, Steven?"

"Is _what_ it?"

"Us, what we're doing."

He stopped moving but remained inside her. "Why?"

"Our friends. Michael—"

"It's none of their damn business."

"Meaning what?"

He chuckled hoarsely, drawing her attention back to his face. " _Meaning,_ " he said, "when they're back, we'll just have to be sneakier." A grin spread over his lips, the mischievous kind that made her believe anything was possible. "We managed with Forman moping around the basement. He had no idea we'd screwed on the deep-freeze, even with the Tide we spilled everywhere."

"Steven!" She laughed and slapped his damp shoulder. "Wouldn't it be easier for you to go back to your skank-of-the-week?"

"Easier, yeah, but not as fun." He patted her butt and renewed his efforts to make her feel good. His hips pulled back, and she let out a surprised gasp when they thrust forward. This was the kind of mind-shattering sex she'd read about in _Cosmo,_ but the magazine never explained how to cope with the emotional consequences. She needed all her willpower not to close her eyes and cling to him.

"So..." she said with some effort, "you're having fun with me?"

" _Less,_ " he said with a grunt, "when you talk." But he kissed her lips as if he hadn't meant what he'd said, and he hugged her like she mattered to him.

Her willpower was gone. She clutched his body and hid her face in his hair. Tears mingled with the sweat on her face. She was shaking with her release. _Crying._ She held her breath so he wouldn't notice, another secret to keep. Because he'd become much more than a summer fling to her.

She'd fallen in love with him.

* * *

Jackie cleaned up like no other chick Hyde knew. Ten minutes after they were naked, sweaty, and screwing, she was dressed in a shirt-and-skirt combo, looking like he'd never touched her. But, man, did he want to touch her again. It was a growing problem, how much he ached to touch her. But he wasn't Fez or Kelso. He could control his dirty urges, especially when the consequence was scaring her off.

"Okay, Steven," she said, hand flat against his closed door, "we have to set up new ground rules if we're gonna keep this going."

He sat down on his cot and put on his socks. "Or you're not gonna let me outta my room?"

She withdrew her hand and leaned her back against the door. "Is this better?"

"Anyone ever tell ya you're smart ass?" He shoved his right foot into his boot. Heat still clung to his skin. It threatened to break out into beads of sweat, damning evidence of his ... _whatever_ with Jackie. "What're your freakin' rules?"

"We have to act like we repel each other."

"We _do repel_ each other."

"No, I mean like magnets. We have to keep a certain physical distance from each other when our friends are around. Otherwise, they'll get suspicious."

"Got it." He stood up and went to the door and—just to mess with her—palmed her hips. "Like this?"

"Nothing like that." Her fingers hooked over his hands, like she was going to pry them off, but she moved in closer. Her effect on him was immediate. He breathed in her scent, a combination of soap and a spicy, floral perfume. "God, Steven—" her body pressed into his erection, "is this what you want happening in front of everyone?"

"You're blushing." His lips grazed her hot cheek, and he whispered in her ear. "Kinda like it."

"Oh, shut up." She released his hands and pushed him back. "I know how sexy I am. I don't need you for that. Anyway..." She gestured for him to step back further. He obliged and bumped into the Formans' old armchair. "This is the minimum amount of space we should have between us," she said. "Don't broadcast to the whole world how much I turn you on."

"Believe me, no one's gonna have a clue. My blood doesn't hike to my cheeks."

She waved at his belt buckle. "Yeah, it just 'hikes' down there."

"Whatever." He glanced at his watch. Their friends would be here in minutes, but he had to disarm his hard-on. He lowered his face to the armchair and inhaled deeply. The fusty smell shot up his nostrils, softening him up as intended, but it also clogged his throat. He coughed and hit his chest.

"Steven?" Jackie rushed to his side and patted his back. "Are you okay?"

"Fine," he said but choked on the word. She continued to pat his back. "I'm fine," he repeated and waved her off, but he wasn't fine. He felt tiny and vulnerable, like plankton floating in the ocean. The current was taking him wherever it willed, and he was powerless against it. "You got anymore rules, or can we get outta here?"

"Just one." She grasped his hand and squeezed it. "We have to start burning each other, like we used to. Our idiot friends haven't noticed we stopped, and they're dumb enough to think we never did."

They'd stopped burning each other? He didn't remember going easy on her, but he must have. Otherwise, she never would've kissed him again.

"Steven, this is really important. You have to be a jerk to me."

"I hear ya. Burn in public; dirty in private." He slung his arm around her shoulders. "It'll be the perfect crime, man."

He grinned at her, and when she grinned back, the ocean current grew stronger. It swept him mercilessly toward his life-long enemy, whose sole purpose was to consume. His body was already being swallowed, but what it really wanted was his heart.

Fortunately, his heart had been cut out the day he was born.

* * *

Hyde scored his fifth basket before a familiar honk blasted the Formans' driveway. Kelso must have hit traffic because he was late. Fez scooped up the basketball, but Hyde dragged him back toward the hoop. Kelso's van pulled into the driveway, seemingly none the worse for wear. It had no dents or visible scratches, despite the miles put into it this summer.

"I don't smell the stinky," Fez whispered. "Should I hit the hubcap with the basketball?"

Hyde snatched the basketball and hurled it into the backyard. It was both the last release of pent-up energy he could risk and the signal for Jackie to come outside. She'd been waiting in the Formans' kitchen, watching him and Fez play a round of one-on-one. The game had made him sweat, a good cover for any Jackie-related sweating he might do.

Donna left the van first, duffel bag dangling from her shoulder. "Hyde, Fez!" she said, but high heels clacked on the pavement as Jackie rushed toward her.

"You feathered your hair!" Jackie shrieked, and Hyde winced at her voice. She shoved Donna's duffel bag aside and pulled her into a hug.

Discomfort twisted Donna's mouth, but otherwise she looked good. Good as in happy. Her pale skin had tanned, and her cheeks were rosy. The California sun was responsible for the first, but the second had to be from her reconciliation with Forman.

"I expected you to be completely sunburned," Jackie said while giving Donna a once-over. Hyde tried to filter out the conversation, but his filter was busted. So when Forman stepped out of the van, Hyde did the first thing that came to mind: he yanked Forman into a hug, the one allotted to him a year.

"Welcome back, man," Hyde said, but his gaze landed on Jackie. She was standing a few feet back with Donna, and a smile brightened her face. That smile was for him, and despite his attempts at emotional distance, his lips twitched up.

"Thanks," Forman said. "Oh, and thanks again for the ticket."

"No problem." Hyde let him go with a pat to the back and trained his cheerful expression on him. No one would suspect its actual origin, and the thought widened Hyde's grin. Digging Jackie's company was like hiding in plain sight. Their friends' lack of expectation made them blind.

"So my folks have no idea I was gone?" Forman said.

"No idea," Hyde said, but it was a lie. Forman was in deep shit with his parents, thanks to Jackie's big mouth, but why ruin a potentially badass burn? "You're golden."

The van's side door slammed closed. Kelso had finally emerged, with a backpack falling off one shoulder. He dragged the backpack's strap back into place and squeezed himself between Donna and Jackie. Donna stepped aside, but Jackie acted like he wasn't even there. She was playing cool, and Hyde had to do the same.

Hey!" Hyde said to Kelso, with just enough enthusiasm, and did something he hadn't done in years: embraced him. He was actually happy to see the guy, but kernels of guilt popped in his stomach.

"Hyde, you sure you wanna be hugging him?" Forman said. "You don't know where he's been this summer."

" _Eric,_ " Donna said. The edge in her voice mirrored Forman's. The drive back from California had taken a few days. Maybe being cooped up in Kelso's van that long had caused trouble.

Hyde released Kelso and said, "What's that about?"

Kelso shrugged, mumbling the equivalent of, "I don't know." Spending two months in California had tanned his skin and lightened his hair, but Hyde doubted if anything deeper had changed.

He glanced over Kelso's shoulder at Jackie. Her face was impassive, but her thoughts weren't hard to discern. Kelso's van had gained over four-thousand miles this summer. In a different city filled with different girls, how much mileage had his dick gotten? Hyde intended to ask, but Kelso scratched Hyde's facial hair affectionately and said, "You got a beard! You look so old!"

"Of course I look old, man. I partied more than you, worked more, drank more, and slept with way more chicks." Hyde made himself yawn. "I'm exhausted, man."

_Bravado._ He was lying out his ass. He'd slept with one chick, Jackie. He'd begun drinking less because of her. He worked as much as he always did, meaning a two-hour nap at the Fotohut. As for partying, he had no one to party with. Jackie wasn't an option, due to the nature of their … _whatever_. Forman had been too depressed over Donna. And Fez's host parents kept Fez chained to the house at night, thanks to an incident with dead fish.

"Strange things can happen over a summer," Forman said. "Guys and gals putting ketchup on their ice cream, building sandcastles with their noses, sleeping with people they never thought they'd sleep with." He fanned himself theatrically. "I think it must be the heat."

Hyde's spine stiffened, and his gaze shot to Jackie again. Her eyes were wide with terror. Had Forman caught them before he left? Was he putting the screws to them now, as a welcome-home present to himself?

"Don't listen to him," Donna said. "He was out in the sun too long. He's suffering from heat stroke." She tugged on Forman's arm. "Let's go to your mom. She's a nurse. She'll—"

"Enough talk," Fez said. "Where are my reunion hugs, you sons of bitches?"

Kelso opened his arms wide, shouting, "Fez! My little man!" but Hyde turned toward the garage. Ivy had crept over the siding during the summer, just like Jackie had crept over him. Messing around with her had messed him up, but he wasn't about to stop. He hadn't been this turned on in his life.

He pressed a hand to his stomach. Of all chicks, Jackie freakin' Burkhart was the one he couldn't quit thinking about. It made him queasy, and he turned back to the driveway. Jackie had pulled Donna to the porch, maybe to distract her from Forman's insinuation, but Hyde wouldn't let himself be blackmailed.

"Forman," he said, "you got somethin' you wanna say, say it."

Jackie glared at Hyde. "Steven, _no one_ wants to hear what Eric has to say."

"Yeah," Donna said. "He—"

The kitchen's glass door slid open. Mrs. Forman, Red, and Bob marched onto the porch, clearly ready to rumble. Donna approached her dad with open arms and shouted, "Hi, Daddy!"

"Don't you ' _Hi, Daddy!'_ me," Bob said, but his voice softened. "Although it does feel good to hear those words again."

Red frowned. "Bob."

"Right." Bob jabbed a finger at Donna: "You're in big trouble, young lady! Now get home. Now! Move!"

She put her head down, and Bob half-followed, half-ushered her to their yard.

Hyde leaned against the back Kelso's van and waited. Red and Mrs. Forman were glowering at Forman, and Forman spouted some weird crap at them. It was a pathetic and entertaining attempt to convince them he hadn't been in California. Hyde would've let it go on, but the trigger had to be pulled sometime.

"Oh, hey," he said, and Forman glanced back at him, "they know."

Red pointed to the kitchen, and when Forman didn't budge, a mixture of fury and sadness overtook Mrs. Forman's face. "Eric, what do you have to say for yourself?" she said.

Forman placed his hands over his heart. "I brought you a seashell."

Red shut his eyes. "Just get in the house!"

Forman lowered his head like Donna had, but he was smirking. He shuffled past his parents, and Mrs. Forman said, "Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in?"

"Oh, yeah..." he lifted his head, "and it was worth it."

Forman disappeared into the house, and Red shouted, "For the love of God!" before he and Mrs. Forman went inside. Forman wasn't off the hook, not by a long shot. But maybe his punishment would provide the the out Hyde and Jackie needed.

"Kelso," Fez said and clapped his hands twice, "you must tell me of all your conquests this summer. Are the girls in California like the songs say?"

"Better." Kelso said. "Hop in the van. I'll tell you all about 'em."

Hyde busied himself in the garage until Kelso and Fez drove away. Then he joined Jackie at the Formans' backyard fence. They were alone, but for how long?

"Steven..." she tugged on the hem of his shirt, "we're in trouble."

"No, we're not." He counted off on his fingers. "First, we're not doin' anything wrong. Second, Forman knows shit. He was just flappin' his gums. He probably does have heat stroke. Third, we can quit foolin' around if ya want. Find someone more your style, or go back to Kelso—"

"No!" Her hands slipped under his shirt and glided up his stomach. Outwardly, he didn't react, but her touch traveled through his nerves, electrifying every part of him. "What I mean is..." she sighed and removed her hands from his skin. "Michael probably slept with half of California— _before_ he even got my breakup letter. He's disgusting, and I'm..."

Her eyes flicked left then right. Hyde did the same. No one was in the driveway or the backyard. They were still alone, and she cupped his cheeks. "I'm having fun with you," she whispered, "but if you want our fling to end with the summer, then—"

He answered by kissing her. The current in his body sparked and stank of ozone. The smell was imaginary, but the sickness it caused was very real. Dropping her would be the right thing to do, for his sanity, for her reputation. For their friends. But he deepened the kiss, causing her to tap his shoulders. He'd gone too far; they were in public, but the second he pulled away, she pulled him back in.

He definitely had to drop her, but once their lips parted, he grabbed her hand. "I got no time limit on this thing," he said and led her into the backyard. "Long as it's fun for the both of us, who cares?"

"So we're gonna keep this up while we're in school?"

"Why not?" They reached the stairs to the basement, and he quit holding her hand as they climbed down. It was a precaution. If Forman tried to sneak out, if he spotted them touching, they were made. "I know plenty of places to fuck in school and not get caught."

She laughed quietly. "So do I..." Her eyes half-closed, and her voice grew husky. "This is gonna be so wrong. And so hot."

"Hot as hell." He hooked his arm around her waist. His restraint eroded whenever she spoke like that. They were more than halfway down the stairs, but his mouth descended onto her neck. He teased the flesh below her ear, and his pulse hammered his skull, as if his whole body were throbbing.

She tapped his shoulders, harder than before. "Stop."

He straightened up, and his arm fell from her waist. She never had to tell him twice, but maybe he'd crossed a line this time. "Sorry."

"You should be sorry. You're turning me on, and if you keep going, we'll end up doing it right here."

"Yeah, see, I don't operate that way." He got in front of her and climbed the rest of the stairs. "I can keep it in my pants."

Her heels clacked after him. "What are you talking about?" Then, with a surprising amount of force, she shoved him against the retaining wall. "Are you implying I have no self-control?" Her hips pressed into him. "Because, I promise you, I have plenty of control."

She ground into him subtly, and his blood rushed south. "I thought you _didn't_ want us to get caught," he said.

"Why, Steven?" Her movements grew more obvious, and his body responded accordingly. "Can't keep it in your pants?"

He sure as hell didn't want to, but he clenched his fists and said, "We both know who's the instigator here. If I'm going down, I'm takin' you with me. Any _Li'l Miss Innocent_ act you pull won't work."

" _Mm-hmm,_ and you look really innocent." She backed off and undid his fly, quicker than he could react. "Exhibit A."

"Proves nothin'." But his erection was fully evident, and he zipped up his jeans. "How about Exhibit B?" He nodded at her chest. Her nipples were poking through the material of her shirt.

She covered her breasts and gaped at him. "I'm cold!"

"It's over seventy-degrees out."

"And I'm used to ninety."

He smirked. "Nice try."

"Exhibit C—" she said, but he moved past her to the basement door. He clutched the door knob, but she jumped onto his back. Her arms looped around his shoulders, and her knees pressed just above his butt. "Exhibit _C,_ " she repeated, "you're too cocky for your own good."

"That makes two of us." He reached behind himself and glided his fingers into her hair. They'd been playing a game, seeing how far they could push each other. "But round two'll have to wait."

"You mean round three." She slipped off him, and her heels hit the pavement. "Because I totally won round two."

"Whatever," he said and opened the door. He peeked inside, but the basement was empty. "Let's go watch the tube. Think _The Price Is Right_ is on."

"Oh, God," she said with a giggle, rousing his life-long enemy: _love._ It laughed with her as he entered the basement and showed him his heart, whole and beating.


	8. Tears and Pudding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER EIGHT  
**TEARS AND PUDDING**

Jackie carried a heavy shoebox to her bed, where Donna was waiting for her. Donna had Jackie's pink flower pillow on her lap. Her head was down, and her red hair half-hid her face. She was also chewing on a fingernail, a habit Jackie couldn't stand. Especially because her nail bits were landing on Jackie's comforter.

"Would you stop that?" Jackie said. "We've got important things to discuss."

Donna pulled her finger from mouth. "Sorry."

"And could you look me in the eye today? I know my beauty is overwhelming, but consider it a gift God's bestowed upon you."

" _Sorry._ " Donna lifted her gaze. "I'm just down because of this whole Catholic-school thing."

Jackie didn't believe her. Donna's mood had increasingly darkened since she'd come back from California, but Jackie sat on the bed and patted Donna's knee. "I know, but at least your dad cares enough to punish you. Remember how you acted when he didn't?"

"Yeah..."

"So your dad enrolling you in Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow is his way of saying he loves you. Just like my dad's is to buy me something expensive." Jackie drummed her fingers on the sides of the shoebox. "And Michael's way was to cheat on me."

"He also used to say, 'I love you,' like, ten times a day."

Jackie narrowed her eyes. Eric wasn't the only one making strange statements lately. His suggestive ramblings three days ago had amounted to nothing, but even if he and Donna didn't know about Jackie's … _whatever_ with Steven, something wasn't quite right.

" _Anyway,_ " Jackie said and slid a hand over the shoebox's top, "this is my _Michael_ box. I saved everything that loser every gave me." She took off the top and picked up the rubber chicken inside. "One-year anniversary..." The chicken bent easily in her hands. It barely had any substance, just like her relationship with Michael, and she tossed it into her trash basket. "What a moron _._ "

Donna pulled a set of chattering teeth from the box. "I think it's kind of sweet. Kelso's such a kid, you know? He's good at having fun."

"You mean with random beach trash? When we were still technically together? Sure." Jackie held up a whoopee cushion. "Valentine's Day present. What a joke."

She threw away the whoopee cushion with no regrets. Her time with Michael was done. She'd stuck the photo albums chronicling their relationship deep into her closet, along with records they'd listened to. But her music collection had a new addition as of yesterday, one she hoped Donna wouldn't notice. It was Steven's first gift to her, _Led Zeppelin IV._

Steven, of course, would never admit it was a present. He claimed he gave it to her to save his sanity, to have something decent to listen to at her house. The record jacket was beat-up. He'd probably stolen the album from Eric, but she didn't care. If their relationship was just a fling to him, he would've walked away three days ago. But he hadn't, and he'd given her a gift, and her blood tingled whenever listened to it.

"Wow," Donna said, winding the chattering teeth, "I guess Kelso's really history for you." She let the knob go, and the teeth clacked together. "But doesn't it make you at least a _little_ sad?"

"Sad? Good riddance." Jackie grabbed the clacking, chattering teeth. She chucked them into the trash, and Donna's shoulders sagged. "What," Jackie said, "did you and Michael form a special little bond when you were in California?"

"No. He's just not that bad. That's all I'm saying."

"Oh, yeah? Well, try being in a relationship with him then talk to me. He broke my heart twice, Donna. I trusted him. I wanted to marry him, and he ran off and slept with the first slut he found."

Donna's gaze sank back to the pillow. Her hair fell over her face but not enough to hide her flushing cheeks.

Jackie gasped and covered her mouth. Donna's weird mood finally made sense, and Jackie's fingers spread apart to unmuffle her voice. " _You_ slept with someone in California! You cheated on Eric!"

"No, I didn't. Eric and I were still broken up—"

"But you did sleep with someone," Jackie said, and when Donna gave no answer, she slapped Donna's thigh. "Spill it, Pinciotti. It was a surfer, wasn't it? Six-feet tall and tanned and hot!"

Donna glared at her, red-faced. "What about you, huh? I never thought you'd get over Kelso until you met someone else … so who is it?"

"What?" Jackie scoffed to hide her relief. Donna definitely didn't know about Steven. But now they both had theories about each other, and if Donna refused to confirm Jackie's, Jackie sure wouldn't confirm Donna's. "Someone else? That's crazy. _You're_ crazy." Her eyes flicked down to the almost-empty shoebox. "Shut your pie-hole!"

"All right, I propose a deal," Donna said. "I won't ask about who you might or might not be dating if you don't ask me anything about California."

Jackie shook Donna's hand without hesitation. "Deal."

* * *

Donna's Catholic school uniform was itchy and in no way represented her style. She'd planned on taking it off as soon as possible, but Eric requested she keep it on. "It's Sunday," he'd said. "You're doing the Lord's work."

Before the summer, his request would've been ignored. The skirt was too short, and the white shirt left no room to be cold. This was a nun's idea of dressing demurely? But she owed Eric a little indulgence. He'd been great about what happened in California.

Her loafers creaked softly on the basement's stone staircase. The leather needed to be broken in, and she'd probably get a blister before that happened. Worse, though, were her knee-high socks. "I have, like, seven pairs," she said to Eric. "So I can't show up at school without them and use the excuse that they're dirty, but on the plus side? My calves won't get chilly."

"I can't believe they're making you wear them every day," he said, but at the bottom of the stairs, he pumped his fist in the air.

"Glad one of us is happy about it." She opened the basement door—and froze two steps inside. Eric bumped into her back, but the sight attacking her eyes hurt much worse: manicured nails on a scruffy cheek, Hyde's face ending where Jackie's began … on the couch where Donna could no longer sit. "What the hell?' she shouted.

Jackie pulled her mouth from Hyde's and turned her head toward the door. Her eyes were wide, and she whispered, "Oh, my God."

Hyde, though, seemed amused. He was on top of her, and he pushed himself up, using the arm of the couch.

"I'm blind!" Eric said and clutched Donna's hand.

"Jackie," Donna said, " _this_ is the someone else?"

"Get off me!" Jackie shouted at Hyde and shoved him backward. He landed safely against the opposite arm of the couch. His gaze, however, landed squarely on Donna.

"Great outfit," he said, and Jackie stared at him. He shrugged, and Donna gleaned no information from their interaction.

"Okay, um … what exactly did you see?" Jackie said once she and Hyde rearranged themselves on the couch. They were sitting properly now, on opposite ends.

"Hands, tongues, yours, _his._ " Eric scrunched up his face. "It was horrible!" He split from Donna and moved behind the couch, maybe for better scrutiny of the kissing culprits. "Thanks to you, I've lost my innocence..."

"You were like Siamese twins joined at the beard," Donna said, with more disgust than she should've felt. How would Hyde have reacted to seeing her and Kelso kiss? How would he judge her if he ever found out?

"Hey, it was her fault, man," Hyde said. "She threw herself at me." He got off the couch and retreated behind his chair. His sunglasses were nowhere to be seen, but his eyes betrayed nothing but annoyance.

"No, no." Jackie pointed at him. "You were on top of _me._ "

"You pulled me. I've done a lot of partying, so, you know..." he wiggled his fingers, "my balance is off."

"This is impossible," Eric said. "You two hate each other."

Donna wrung her hands as she tried to make sense of everything. But the only conclusion she came to was, "Kelso is gonna freak out."

"Kelso..." A smile broke on Eric's lips. "Kelso!"

Donna kept wringing her hands. "Eric, don't. _Please._ "

"Yeah, settle down, Esmeralda," Hyde said. "Kelso doesn't need to know about this." He sat in his chair and leaned back as if nothing was wrong, but the basement was off-kilter. Why didn't he see that?

"You're right," Donna said. "Kelso can't find out you've been … experimenting with 'free love'."

Hyde sneered at her. "Free love? Try _sexual radicalism._ "

"But this is perfect, Donna," Eric said. "They broke the code, too—"

Jackie smacked the side of Eric's leg. "Oh, I didn't break anything. Michael slept around on me when we were still together. This meaningless fling," she gestured between Hyde and herself, "started _after_ I sent Michael my break-up letter. And Steven and I can stop whenever we want."

"Then maybe you should," Donna said.

"No! You two kids keep on doing whatever it is," Eric said and patted Jackie's shoulder. She gave him a dirty look before shoving his hand away.

Hyde quirked up an eyebrow. "Why the sudden change of heart, Forman? And what's this about us breaking the code, _too?_ What code?"

"Heat stroke!" Donna dashed to Eric's side and made a show of feeling his forehead. "Mrs. Forman said it could take a weeks to recover." She dragged him backward, but Fez appeared at the basement door and blocked their escape.

"Well," he said, looking her up and down, "naughty ladies wear plaid."

Had circumstances been different, she would've yanked off his waggling eyebrows. But she needed a quick getaway, before Jackie and Hyde figured out her own secret. She pulled Eric to the staircase, and Fez called after them, "Hey, why are you leaving, sexy schoolgirl?"

"We just caught those two," she waved at the door from three steps up, "Frenching like a couple of French people at a Frenching festival."

"What? That's impossible!" Fez darted inside the basement. He'd probably occupy Jackie and Hyde for the next hour, asking them all sorts of questions. Maybe he'd even get them so flustered they'd forget the stupid, revealing things Eric had said.

* * *

Donna was exhausted. During the last week, ever since discovering Jackie and Hyde's "meaningless fling," Eric had laid traps for Kelso. And every day, Donna had disarmed them. Navigating a new school was draining enough, with teachers who doled out corporal punishment and a student body who didn't know its Zeppelin from its Zappa. She understood Eric's desire for revenge, but the truth was Jackie and Hyde's to tell. They deserved that chance, however creepy and unnatural their relationship.

"Could you leave Kelso alone today?" Donna said in the Formans' garage. Eric was sweaty from their twenty-mile bike-ride. Each afternoon, he picked her up from school and took her home. It was beyond sweet, but that didn't give him the right to torture their friend.

He put out the bicycle's kickstand and gazed longingly at the Vista Cruiser. His parents had taken away his driving privileges, as punishment for going to California. "If Hyde did what you told him to do today," he said, "Kelso will be in all the pain I need."

But ten minutes later, they learned Hyde had wussed out. He'd had an opportunity to tell Kelso the truth at the DMV, and he didn't take it. Out of guilt? Fear? Whatever his reasons, Donna more than empathized. She still had trouble looking Jackie in the face.

The difference between them, though, was that Donna's fling with Kelso had truly been meaningless. Jackie and Hyde were obviously falling for each other—the not-so-secret glances they exchanged, sitting together in Kelso's absence, the Zeppelin record on Jackie's shelf. Hyde had even become territorial, frogging Kelso whenever he made a move on her. They'd developed genuine feelings for each other, despite the laws of nature, and Kelso wouldn't take their relationship well. No matter who told him.

Eric seemed determined, however, to deliver the news himself. As soon as Kelso strolled into the basement, Eric enticed him upstairs with the promise of pudding. Donna went after them, but Eric had given no hint about his latest trap.

"Pudding!" Kelso shouted and led the charge into the kitchen, but Eric steered him toward the swinging door.

"First thing's first," Eric said. "And that thing is in the living room."

"But I want pudding!"

"We all want pudding, but it has to be earned." He pushed Kelso into the living room, and Donna followed. "I'm creating a game show for my Independent Study project," Eric said and gestured to the bookshelves. "If you help me out, we'll both win."

"I like winning," Kelso said. "What do I gotta do?"

"Round One: find a dictionary. You have two minutes." Eric glanced at his watch. "And … go!"

Kelso scanned the bookshelves, and Donna chewed on her pinky nail, hoping to figure out Eric's angle in time to stop him. His traps were growing more elaborate by the day. Maybe he'd created a Rube Goldberg machine. Pulling out the book could start a chain reaction, one that eventually slapped a damning note onto Kelso's forehead.

"Got it!" Kelso said after a minute and plucked out the Formans' battered dictionary. "What do I win?"

Eric raised his fists in victory. "A spoon for your pudding! Now, if you want your chocolatey reward, look up this word—"

Donna had been wrong about the Rube Goldberg machine, but her guess about the chain reaction was right. She lunged for the dictionary, but Kelso was faster. He twisted away from her and said, "What word?"

Eric grinned smugly. " _Adulteress._ "

"And I'll get a big bowl if I read the definition?" Kelso said.

"As big a bowl as we've got, buddy."

"All right!" Kelso flipped through the dictionary's pages, and Donna tried again to get the book. "No, Donna!" He raised the dictionary above his head. " _I'm_ the contestant. You can play after me."

He backed into the kitchen's swinging door and vanished behind it. By the time she and Eric were in the kitchen, Kelso had read the entry. "Huh. I always thought an adulteress was a tiny adult."

Donna choked down a grunt. Eric needed to read that definition, too, because the only adulterer this summer had been Kelso. She formulated a subtle way of telling him, but her breath stalled in her throat. Jackie and Hyde were visible through the glass door—and making out.

Kelso couldn't see them. He was facing the opposite direction, with the dictionary in front of his eyes. Donna had to get him out of the kitchen, but Eric tapped her shoulder.

"Oh, my God," he mouthed silently. "Now! We do this now." He jabbed a finger at the oblivious Kelso then at the glass door.

"No," she mouthed back. Then she said to Kelso, "Hey, how about we get you comfortable in the living room? I'll make the pudding while you and Eric watch _Gilligan's Island—_ "

"Wait," Kelso said, "are you sure Mrs. Forman has enough mix?" He left the dictionary on the counter, turned around, and opened the overhead cabinet. "Beets, beets … and more beets. Man, why does she buy so many beets? Gotta be a pregnancy thing."

While his attention was occupied, Donna mentally begged Jackie and Hyde to get away from each other, but Kelso closed the cabinet without opening another. She grasped his arm and tugged him toward the swinging door. "Don't worry about the pudding," she said. "I'll make sure you get—"

He laughed. He had a clear view of the glass door now, and her stomach plummeted to her feet.

"Why is Hyde kissing Jackie?" he said and looked to Eric for an answer. Eric shrugged, as if to shove the question back at him. Kelso looked to Donna next, but she had no idea what to say. "What the hell?" he shouted and hurtled toward the glass door. "He's dead!"

Jackie and Hyde finally parted. She pushed at Hyde's chest playfully as Kelso fumbled with the door. It was locked, and he yanked and yanked, but Jackie and Hyde were already walking off. "Open, damn it! No, they're getting away! What is wrong with this thing?"

"A better question is," Eric said, "what's wrong with you?"

Kelso blinked wetly. "Huh?"

Donna opened cabinet after cabinet, searching for the pudding mix. She didn't know what was worse, Kelso seeing Jackie and Hyde making out or Eric's glee at their friend's agony.

"They—they weren't just kissing," Kelso said. "They were smiling! And he put his arm around her waist. Why was his arm around her waist?"

Donna shut the last cabinet. "Where's the damn pudding?"

"In the fridge," Eric said. "Mom already made it."

"And you couldn't have told me this?" She flung open the fridge door and found a big, plastic-wrapped bowl of pudding. She grabbed it and kicked the fridge door closed. Then she ordered Kelso to sit down at the breakfast table. She placed the pudding in front of him, but Eric snatched the spoon from her hand. "Eric, what are you doing?"

"He doesn't get any comfort-pudding yet." He pointed the spoon at Kelso. "How are you feeling?"

"How do you think he's feeling?" She got another spoon from the drawer, but Eric tried to take that one, too. "Cut it out," she said, "or, I swear, I'll gouge out your eye."

He backed off, and she passed Kelso the spoon.

"Who chooses a chick over a friend?" Kelso said hoarsely. Tears spilled down his cheeks, and he wiped them with his sleeve.

"You do," Eric said.

"No, but I didn't steal Donna from you. I borrowed her and gave her back."

"That's it. I'm taking this." Eric picked up the bowl of pudding stepped away from the table.

Donna pressed the heel of her hand into her throbbing forehead. She needed an Aspirin. "Eric, give it back."

"Oh, I'm just 'borrowing' it. Once I've eaten most of it, he can have the rest."

"Come on." She gestured for the bowl. "Stop being an ass."

" _I'm_ the ass? Donna, he doesn't deserve pudding or Jackie. He's a hypocrite!"

The table scraped the floor as Kelso jumped to his feet. "Eric, my situation is totally different from yours. Hyde's, like, my oldest friend, and he stabbed me in the back."

Eric slammed the bowl of pudding onto the counter. "And what did you do to me?" He kicked the cabinet below the sink, once, twice. "Shit!"

"Eric." Donna cupped his elbow, but he pulled away and marched toward Kelso. He was angrier than she'd ever seen him, even in California. He must've suppressed it, afraid he'd scare her off. Or maybe he just hadn't processed it yet.

"No, you know what?" he said to Kelso. "You're right. Our situations _are_ different. Hyde and Jackie, as unholy as their union is, have real feelings for each other. Like Donna and I have for each other. You wouldn't know a real feeling if it crawled up your butt."

He unlocked the glass door, shoved it open, and left. Donna's instinct was to go after him, but she brought the pudding to Kelso instead. Eric would be okay. He just needed space, but Kelso couldn't be left alone.

She sat with him at the table and offered him his spoon. He took it and sniffled. "Thanks, Donna."

"Of course. I know how hard this is for you."

He scooped out a blob of pudding. He shoveled it into his mouth and swallowed. "I wish Eric did." A tear rolled off his nose and fell into the bowl. "Man, the next time I see Hyde, I'm kicking his ass."

"Okay, do you really not see the parallel here?" She picked up a napkin and blotted his wet cheek. "Eric wanted to kick _your_ ass a few seconds ago."

"But you went back to him as soon as he came to California. Jackie should've come back to me as soon as I got home, but did she?"

She scooted her chair closer to him. He really was a hypocrite, but so was she. She'd urged Hyde and Jackie to tell him the truth, yet her own truth remained hidden from Jackie. Lying to her was simply easier. It always had been.

Shame clogged her throat as Kelso leaned his head on her shoulder. "Sometimes I think you're the only one who gets me," he said. Then something warm and sticky tickled her neck. He'd pressed his lips to her skin, had started kissing her.

"Kelso!" She pushed him away and stood up.

"What? You're with Eric now, so we can't do it anymore?"

"Duh!"

He dug his spoon into the pudding. "Well, I still had a week with you, but Eric had to ruin that by showing up in California!"

"You were just upset about Jackie and Hyde being together. Now you're upset about me and _Eric_ being together?" She shoved herself through the open glass door. The immensity of Eric's rage had seeped into her blood. "Unbelievable."

"I want my last week, Donna!" he shouted after her. "You owe me a week!"


	9. Days of Point Place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER NINE  
**DAYS OF POINT PLACE**

Kelso's plan was to burst into the basement and interrogate Hyde, but his hand stiffened on the doorknob. "Okay, and _turn,_ " he said, but his hand refused to obey. The easiest option would be to escape up the stone stairs. He hadn't seen any of his friends since yesterday, since he'd caught Jackie eating Hyde's face … but who was actually his friend anymore?

Hyde had stolen Kelso's girl, and Jackie had let Hyde steal her. Eric wanted to kick Kelso's ass, and Donna wouldn't give Kelso the week of loving she owed him.

He pulled in a breath through his nose and shut his eyes. He had to go for it, just barrel inside and face the hordes that were against him. His hand finally turned the knob. He rushed into the basement, but his eyes were still closed, and he crashed into something hard—the couch? He toppled onto two warm bodies, and Eric shouted, "Kelso, get your head out of my fun-parts!"

Kelso couldn't see anything. His face was pressed into—what he hoped was—Eric's leg. He reached blindly for the back of the couch, but Eric began to shove him.

"Eric, stop!" Donna said, and a lap disappeared from beneath Kelso's hips. It had to be hers, and disappointment spread through his body. He could've enjoyed his awkward position had he known.

A loud scrape clawed at his ears, as if Donna were pushing the spool table aside. Strong arms grabbed him around the middle. They also had to be hers, and they twisted him around and dragged him to the floor. A wrestling move. He'd experienced her grappling skills before but never so gently.

He remained flat on his back and blinked a few times. She was standing over him, and he said, "You still mad at me?"

"No," she said and helped him to his feet.

He was tempted to make a move, but Eric shouted, "Hey!" and wedged himself in front of her. "I see how you're looking at my lady—stop it!"

Kelso gestured to himself. "I'm not doing anything! _Hyde's_ the one who's doing something. To Jackie!"

"Uh-oh," said a familiar voice, and Kelso gaze shot to the wooden staircase. Mrs. Forman was climbing down with a laundry basket in her hands. "Sounds like he knows."

"Finally," Fez said behind her.

She reached the bottom of the stairs and put the basket on the dryer. "Things are about to get very interesting around here. Ooh, it'll be like _Days of Our Lives._ " She deepened her voice. "'These are the _Days of Point Place..._ '"

She laughed, prompting Kelso to glare at Eric. "Your mom knew? And _Fez?_ " Kelso waved in Fez's general direction. "Fez never knows anything!"

"I know," Fez said. "I'm really coming into my own." He sounded like he was smiling, but Kelso couldn't be sure. His blurring eyesight was fixed on Eric.

"What?" Eric said.

"How long did _you_ know?" Kelso said, tasting tears on his tongue.

"Long enough to bother you—"

"Eric," Donna said, in that warning tone she'd used since California.

Kelso, though, finally moved his wet gaze off Eric. He searched the basement for a sympathetic face. Fez's was full of amusement, but Mrs. Forman's seemed sad, and Kelso focused on hers. "Whatever," he said. "None of this is as bad as Hyde not telling me."

Mrs. Forman's expression shifted. It grew unexpectedly hard, and Kelso took a step back. Did she know about what he'd done with Donna? But she said nothing, just shook her head.

Kelso focused on the walls and shuddered. Even the basement had no sympathy. Its stone bricks were like a dungeon's, dank and cold. He turned toward Donna. Eric's arm was draped protectively around her waist, but Kelso spoke to her anyway. "You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna _make_ Hyde tell me."

"How are you gonna do that?" she said.

"By outwitting him conversationally." Kelso rubbed the remnants of tears from his eyes. "What a fine game of cat-and-mouse it will be!"

"I'm gonna go find an eye patch," Mrs. Forman said. She scurried back upstairs but not before adding, "Fez, if anything interesting happens, tell me!"

"Yes, Miss Kitty." Fez strode up to Kelso and looked him up and down. He did the same to Donna and Eric. Then he did it again to Kelso.

"Fez, quit it," Kelso said, but Fez got closer to him. He sniffed Kelso's shoulder, and Kelso shouted, "I told you to quit it!"

Fez backed off but not by much. "Something strange is going on here."

"Yeah," Kelso thrust a hand toward Hyde's room, "my oldest friend is nailing my girlfriend! I bet they're doing it in there now. I gotta stop them!"

The basement shower was his best bet. He slid the curtain to one side. The faucet glinted at him, and he said, "Eric, where's your dad keep the hose? I bet I could rig it up to this thing and flood Hyde's room—"

"We don't know if they've gotten that far yet," Donna said. "Remember, it took her almost a year to have sex with you."

Kelso started to unscrew the aerator from the faucet. "And it took you and Eric over a year to do it, but you and I did it in, like, a week!"

Fez gasped, and Kelso's fingers froze on the aerator. The color drained from Donna's face as blood flushed into Eric's.

"You and Donna…" Fez pointed a shaky finger at Kelso. "You and _Donna?_ "

"Kelso and Donna what?" Hyde said by the basement door. He'd slipped inside like a ninja. Or maybe he and Jackie had sneaked out of his room, gone up the basement stairs without anyone noticing, and _then_ he'd reentered the basement from the outside. But he wasn't the only one with ninja-like abilities.

The aerator fell into Kelso's palm. He prepared to chuck it at Hyde's head when Fez said, "Didn't do anything that Eric and Donna haven't done."

Hyde eyed Kelso. "What's he talkin' about?"

"Kelso," Eric said and pulled Kelso from the shower, "why don't you start your battle of wits? Oh, but without this." He snatched the aerator, depriving Kelso of his weapon, but Eric was right. The sooner Kelso got this started, the sooner he'd have his confession.

Kelso sauntered up to Hyde, who hadn't moved from the basement door. "So, Hyde … how are you? And by _how are you,_ I mean what's up? And by _what's up,_ I mean—"

"Well, I guess you know about me and Jackie," Hyde said.

"Aha!" Kelso walked a victory lap around him. "So the first point in the battle of wits goes to me!"

"What battle of wits? I admit it. I'm messing around with Jackie."

Kelso gaped at him. That was all Hyde had to say? No remorse? No offer of compensation? Kelso balled up his fists. The time for talk was over. Playground rules were in effect, like that time Timmy Wilson stole his sandbox shovel.

"I hate you!" Kelso shouted and ran at Hyde, but Hyde shoved him toward the wall. Kelso's face banged into Eric's stereo speaker. Pain radiated from his eye into his skull, but his pride hurt worse.

He clutched face and fled the basement. Hyde was too strong for him, but Eric wasn't. Maybe Kelso would have better luck fighting him over Donna.

* * *

Donna longed to crawl into bed, a need that grew when she found Jackie in her kitchen. The day was only half-over, but driving to the airport with Eric had been a highlight. He'd recounted Kelso collision with the stereo speaker repeatedly. Hyde had done to Kelso what Eric wished he could do, but violence wasn't the answer. Understanding and forgiveness were the only solution, but that would come only with time.

The drive back home with Eric's grandparents hadn't been better. Eric's grandmother liked to shout. It kept Eric from talking, but it also gave Donna a chance to obsess. Her summer fling with Kelso was no longer private knowledge. Fez had learned about it this morning, but so far he'd managed to stay quiet. Donna knew this because Jackie hadn't tried to kill her yet.

"Steven told me Michael found out about us," Jackie said and leaned her hip against the kitchen island. Her shoulders slumped, but she asked for a play-by-play. Donna gave it to her.

"And when he saw you guys kissing, he just fell apart," Donna said, spreading mustard on her sandwich. Bologna-and-cheese. Not a spectacular lunch, but she had little appetite for more. Her stomach felt as cramped as her kitchen did. "I mean, it was awful."

She brought her sandwich, and the one she'd made for Jackie, to the breakfast table. Jackie joined her and said, "How awful, Donna? As awful as when I caught him kissing Laurie? Or when he ran off on me to California?"

"Jackie—" Donna's voice hitched, but she forced the rest out, "if you don't work things out with Kelso, everybody's gonna choose sides, and nobody's gonna be friends anymore." She cut her sandwich in half, but the knife might as well have sliced her integrity. Who was she to preach? Once her own secret came out, she and Jackie wouldn't be friends anymore anyway.

"Well, that's not my fault." Jackie bit into her sandwich, chewed quickly, and didn't speak again until she ate another bite. "Look, he deserted me. He broke my heart. I didn't do anything wrong."

Donna's cheeks grew hot, and despite her fading tan, Jackie had to see her blushing. "You're right. Kelso did desert you," and Donna had accepted him into her bed. "But you're dating his best friend. You've gotta talk to him. You owe him an explanation."

Her last sentence pierced her brain like a steel rod. She owed Jackie an explanation, too, but her tongue wouldn't form the words.

"Do I?" Jackie said. "You spent the summer with him, so tell me: how many skanks did he sleep with before we were technically broken up? And don't you dare claim we had a deal not talk about it. You know all about me and Steven now, so that deal is off."

"I don't know."

"You're lying. You're getting a sunburn just talking about this."

Donna touched her cheek. It really was burning, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. Instead, she took a huge bite of her sandwich.

Jackie twisted a lock of hair around her finger. "Steven and I didn't even kiss until I sent my break-up to Michael; don't you get it?" When Donna didn't respond, Jackie dragged Donna's plate to her side of the table. Half of Donna's sandwich had become a hostage. "Okay, how about this?" Jackie said. "Michael cheated on me with Laurie, _for months,_ and you didn't tell him he owed me an explanation. I could've caught a disease, Donna! If anyone owes anyone an explanation, it's you to me."

Donna stuffed what she had of her sandwich into her mouth. What she'd done to Jackie was indefensible. Her loyalties were split, and she'd chosen Kelso.

"Why are you so protective of him?" Jackie a placed a hand over her heart. "Does _our_ friendship mean nothing to you?"

"No," Donna said roughly. The food she'd just devoured wasn't sitting well, and neither were her choices. But they stemmed from how much Jackie's friendship meant to her. The moment she confessed, Jackie would hate her, just like Kelso hated Hyde.

"So how many sluts was it, Donna? Does he owe me a dozen explanations or a hundred?"

Donna lowered her head. Bread crumbs covered the yellow place mat. She was tempted to count them and give Jackie that number, but she said, "Just one.".

"One?"

She nodded as her throat closed up. The same pressure pushed against her eyes, but she bit into her pinky nail, close to the nail bed. The pain subverted her tears, and she looked up at Jackie. "You're right. You don't owe him anything."

"Damn right I don't." Jackie shoved Donna's plate back at her. "But I'll talk to him anyways because I'm better than he is."

"And better than I am?"

"You didn't cheat on anyone. You just kept the truth to yourself..." Jackie took a bite of her sandwich and chewed it slowly, as if she were thinking. "Though you tried to tell me, didn't you? In your own way, but I..." She sighed. "Okay, so I wasn't the easiest person to talk to about Michael back then, and you did try—"

"Jackie, stop." Donna stood up from the table. "You don't owe _me_ anything either." She inched toward the back door. She had to get out of here. Jackie's understanding was as bruising as a fist. "I'll see you later, okay? I've got to, uh … talk to Eric's grandparents."

Donna bolted outside. The door slammed shut behind her, blocking any questions Jackie might ask, but Donna's mind screamed its own question: when had she turned into a coward?


	10. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER TEN  
**CONFESSIONS**

Kelso burst into the basement, wearing a pair of ski goggles. His first entrance today had gotten him a bruised eye, but this one would get him justice. Hyde was standing by Eric's stereo with a record in his hands. Kelso's breathing grew shallow, but he snatched the record and lobbed it at the washing machine. "Try to get my eye now!"

Hyde tilted his head, as if Kelso's goggles baffled him. Kelso opened his mouth for another taunt, but pain slammed into his shin. He cried out and fell to his knees as heat flooded his body. Hyde had kicked him, the way Jackie used to. She probably taught him the move, in case he and Kelso ever got into a fight.

Kelso tried to stand, but Hyde hooked an arm around his neck and dragged him to the couch. Kelso dug his nails into Hyde's skin. His sneakers scraped against the concrete floor, attempting to find purchase. He needed to get back his advantage, but Hyde was too strong and too fast. His grip shifted from Kelso's neck to Kelso's shoulders. He ripped off Kelso's goggles and pushed him, stomach-side down, onto the couch.

"Hyde—oof!" Kelso's demand went unfinished as a heavy weight pressed into his back. Hyde was sitting on him, and he restrained Kelso further by squeezing his calf and pushing down on his shoulder. "Hyde, get off!" Kelso shouted. He had no girl. No friends. No respect. "Get the hell off me!"

"Not until you calm down!"

Kelso squirmed on the couch, but this made Hyde push on him harder. Blood crackled in Kelso's veins, causing his skin to tingle uncomfortably. His bruised eye throbbed in his skull, and he grunted into the cushions. Adrenaline was supposed to make people super-human, but his wasn't working right. "I'll calm down when you get—"

A spit-soaked finger swirled the inside of Kelso's ear. "Ah, a wet one!" Fez said.

_Fez?_ He must've been sitting by Kelso's head. Were other people in the basement, too? Kelso hadn't spotted anyone else, but he'd been entirely focused on Hyde.

"Fez," Kelso said, "I'm gonna get free eventually, and I'm gonna kick your ass!"

Fez swirled his wet finger in Kelso's ear again. "Oh? Did Eric kick your beautiful ass when he learned about you and Donna?"

"Fez—" Donna said from somewhere.

Kelso stiffened under Hyde's weight. _Not her._ Not Donna. Her presence made the situation so much worse. Hyde was treating him like a rabid squirrel, and unless Kelso could break free like the Hulk, Donna would never touch him again.

"No, Donna," Fez said. "Why should my ass be kicked when Kelso is the one who spent the summer with you? Just like Hyde spent the summer with Jackie."

Kelso should've stayed quiet, but the only body part he could effectively move was his mouth, and he said, "But that's totally different! Eric and Donna were broken up, and—and—wait." He angled his head as best he could and glimpsed Fez's face. "Fez, how did you know that _Eric_ knows?"

"I told you: I'm really coming into my own."

"Hold up," Hyde said. "Kelso, what the hell happened between you and Donna?" His grip tightened on Kelso's calf and shoulder, but he eased up on Kelso's back—only to crash down heavier. "That crap earlier in the basement wasn't bullshit?"

"Should I tell him," Fez said, "or will you?"

Kelso's ribs began to hurt under Hyde's weight, but he needed to shut Fez up. "Hey, we're losing sight of the real issue here!"

"Oh, I think this _is_ the real issue, man." Hyde rose off Kelso's back again and crashed onto it even harder. "Did you grab Donna's boob in California? Walk in on her naked?"

Kelso leaned his forehead into the couch and groaned. Hyde was crushing him, but Donna said, "Hyde, we slept together, okay? Leave him alone."

Hyde's weight on him disappeared. Kelso's back was cold, but his lungs could finally expand. He sucked in a shaky breath as his heart pounded against the cushions. Donna's admission had saved his life, but for how long? "She's drunk!" he gasped. "Caught me doin' it with a redhead in California, and she's all confused—"

"Oh, my God," Fez said, "it is worse than I imagined."

Hyde yanked Kelso off the couch. Donna yelled at Hyde to stop, but he hauled Kelso across the basement. Pain pulsed in Kelso's bruised eye. He hadn't fully caught his breath yet, and he couldn't fight when Hyde pushed him against the water heater.

"You nailed Donna?" Hyde's voice was quiet, but he had Kelso by the shirt collar. His knuckles were by Kelso's chin, and the fury in his eyes seethed through his sunglasses. It had Kelso trembling, but when Hyde's focus shifted to Donna, Kelso didn't attempt escape. "Were you a willing partner?" Hyde said.

Donna must have nodded because when Hyde looked at Kelso again, his features were less tense. "So," Hyde shook him a little, "you're actin' all self-righteous and pissed about me screwing Jackie while knowin' you did the same with Forman's girl?"

"But—but—but I didn't steal Donna from Eric!" The justification sounded empty, but it was all Kelso had. "She went back to him. You took Jackie from me, and she's still with you!"

Hyde's jaw clenched, and his temple pulsed. He drew back his right fist, and Kelso shut his eyes, bracing for a slug to the jaw.

"Hyde, no!" Donna shouted, and Kelso opened his unbruised eye a crack. She was at Hyde's side, clutching his fist with both hands. "If you're gonna punch him, then you're gonna have to punch me, too."

Hyde lowered his arm and yanked Kelso to the clothes dryer. Kelso's back was sweating. The water heater had warmed up his shirt, and it would've burned him had Hyde not pulled him away.

"Hyde—" Donna grabbed Hyde's right hand again, before it could reassert a grip on Kelso's collar. She opened his fingers and wrapped them around her own shirt collar. "I was with Kelso because I wanted to be. Eric rejected me, and I thought we were over, and Kelso was there and … like, a really good friend."

The corners of Kelso's lips twitched up. He was liking Donna more and more, and if she left Eric for him, then maybe seeing Jackie with Hyde wouldn't feel so bad. But Donna would never date him seriously. At best, he'd be her boy-toy, and the thought collapsed his smile.

"I could've been a good friend, too, Donna," Fez said and joined them in the laundry area. "Why did you not come to me?"

"Fez, can it." Hyde released Kelso and Donna's collars and turned away from them. Kelso could've made a break for the stairs, but Hyde was still too dangerous. He was patrolling the laundry area like an agitated bee. "Man," he said and scratched the back of his neck, "what're we gonna tell Jackie?"

"Nothing," Kelso said.

"The truth," Donna said.

Fez clapped his hands and grinned. "Oh, I can't wait to see this."

Donna leaned her butt against the dryer. Her hip pressed into Kelso's, and the contact sent enough of a thrill that he slid away from her. "When did the basement become _A Midsummer's Night Dream?_ " she said.

Kelso shrugged. "In the summer."

* * *

Jackie approached the Formans' porch hesitantly. She'd hoped to find Michael alone, but he was in the Formans' kitchen with Steven and their friends. He held a bunched-up washcloth to his eye; it had to be filled with ice, and she gestured for him to come out.

He did but not alone. Steven and their friends accompanied him. "Um, guys?" Jackie waved toward the sliding door. "Could you give me and Michael some privacy?"

"Yeah, Fez, maybe you should, you know..." Eric's fingers mimed a pair of legs walking.

She huffed and gripped the porch railing. This was going to be hard enough without an audience. "No, I mean all of you."

"Sorry," Eric said and sat in one of the porch chairs, "but I've had a helluva year, a helluva a summer, and this day hasn't been any better. My mom learned she isn't pregnant but in the midst of some kind of horrible, hormonal pause. So what's about to happen has gotta be the start of a turn-around for me..." he grinned smugly, "and, well, there's no way I'm going to miss it."

"What's he talking about?" she said, looking at Steven. He shook his head, as if he were afraid to say, and her pulse tightened. "Are you ending things with me? Because of Michael?"

Donna stepped forward before he could answer. "Jackie, Kelso and I—"

"Got our faces painted!" Michael said, moving in front of Donna. "In California. You always begged me to do that with you, and I did it with her, and I'm sorry."

"Kelso, come on," Eric said. "Don't make Donna say it."

"Fine." Michael pulled his makeshift ice pack from his eye. The skin around it was purple. "Jackie, this summer, Donna and I weren't … not-touching each other."

"You and Donna..." Jackie's body jerked, as if he'd stuck a sparking, exposed wire against her spine. "You and _Donna?_ "

"That's exactly what I said!" Fez blurted then clapped a hand over his mouth. He sank into the chair beside Eric's.

"You knew?" Jackie said to Fez. "You knew and didn't tell me?"

"He barely knew," Eric said, but the air had become like water. The more she breathed, the more she felt like she'd drown.

Her gaze landed on Donna, whose cheeks had that sunburned glow again. "'Just one,'" Jackie said, repeating what Donna had told her at lunch. "'Just one...' You're the slut who slept with my boyfriend?"

"No, Donna slept with _Kelso,_ " Fez said. "Open your ears, woman!"

An incredulous smile curved Michael's lips, as if he'd just won a trampoline. "Holy shit..."

Jackie's eyes snapped to Steven, but he seemed paralyzed. His mouth was slightly open, and his arms hung limply at his sides. "No, wait," she said. "I didn't mean—"

"Hey, it's cool, man," he said, regaining movement but sounding indifferent. "We're not official. If you're still into Kelso, even after all of this crap, then—"

She was definitely drowning. Her lungs burned, and she grew dizzy, "I'm not."

"It kinda sounds like you are," Michael said. His smile had deepened, into one of triumph, and he opened his arms wide. "And I forgive you, baby. Let's start over. It'll be like this summer never happened—"

"Steven..." She reached for Steven's hand, but her fingers grazed air. He'd stepped into the driveway.

"Yeah, it's gettin' crowded out here," he said and disappeared into the Formans' backyard.

Her heart chased after him, but her legs didn't. If he wanted her—and if he was worth wanting—then he'd wait for her to explain. Right now, though, she needed explanations of her own.

"You and Michael," she said, turning her full attention onto Donna. "Oh, my God, you were so sympathetic toward him because—wait. Do you have feelings for him?"

"No!" Donna said, and Eric stared at her. He didn't move from the porch chair, but his hands cupped his knees, white-knuckled.

Jackie mustered her most condescending voice. "You might want to do a little soul-searching, Donna. I had feelings for Steven a long time before I could admit them to myself. Maybe you do have a thing for Michael. It would account for a lot of your behavior."

She flipped her hair and strode away from the porch, but her vindication was halfhearted. Donna wasn't some bitchy cheerleader. She was Jackie's dull and trustworthy best friend.

_Former_ best friend.

The loss wrung the last bits of air from Jackie's lungs. She managed to get to the backyard without fainting, but she needed to breathe. Hidden from spying eyes, in the space between the Formans' house and the Pinciottis', she pounded on her chest.

Her heart pounded back. Thoughts of Steven, of their relationship ending, fueled her blood. Her breaths remained shallow, and stars burst in her vision, but the basement was only a staircase away. She climbed down the stone steps carefully, using the retaining wall for support. At the bottom, her ear pressed up against the door.

Spacey music reverberated through the wood: Pink Floyd's _Dark Side of the Moon_. Steven had played the album for her many times, during some of their best times. He had to be in there, and she turned the doorknob, ready to fight for him.


	11. Moving On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** _That '70s Show_ copyright The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC and Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, LLC.

CHAPTER ELEVEN  
**MOVING ON**

Eric stood up on legs that felt brittle. He didn't pull Donna inside the house; the strain of confronting her was too great. The porch, with its extra eyes and ears, would have to do. Fez tried to stand up, too, but Eric pushed him—by the face—down into his chair. Kelso, meanwhile, had migrated to the driveway. He was grinning up at the darkening sky, as if thanking God for his good fortune.

"Donna," Eric said quietly, "do you have feelings for him?" He gestured to Kelso. "Because if you do—"

"I don't." She grasped his hand. "That was Jackie's attempt at revenge, to plant a seed of doubt in your head. And it looks like it worked."

"No. I … no." He squeezed her hand, even as he glanced down at his shoes. She obviously cared about Kelso, maybe even loved him. It was something he'd have to accept if they were to move on. "I get it," he said, looking at her. "And I'll get over it. Just give me time."

"You've got all the time in the world." She pulled him into a hug, and he held onto her like he hadn't seen her in years. Her fingers stroked the back of his hair, soothing the uncertainty from his skull. "But this?" she said and hiked her thumb at Kelso when they parted. "It's got to be taken care of. Now."

Eric used all his willpower not to follow as she marched up to Kelso, who was still staring at the sky. She smacked him in the chest and said, "Stop it with the smiling already! Jackie's over you, all right?"

Kelso's grin didn't fade. "You heard her, Donna! She called me her boyfriend. She still wants me."

"That was just something she said from shock. You know what that's like!"

He cupped her shoulder. "This whole jealousy thing you've got going is hot and all, but..." his hand slipped off her, "you had your chance. When Eric came to California, you could've kept things going with me, but you chose to end it."

"Oh, my God, you are the most delusional, self-centered..." She grasped the top of her head, seemingly too exasperated to speak.

"That's all you got?" Fez said. "At least call him a sonuvabitch."

Eric would've called Kelso a lot worse, but he had something else to say. He strode to the driveway and cupped Kelso's shoulder, copying Kelso's move on Donna. "Buddy, listen. Donna doesn't want you. _Jackie_ doesn't want you, and guess where she's gone?"

"To put on something sexy for me," Kelso said. "She's got some seducing to do tonight."

" _No,_ " Eric sweetened his voice, speaking as if Kelso were in kindergarten, "she's gone after Hyde."

"To break things off with him. _Duh._ "

"Forget it, Eric," Donna said. "He's hopeless."

"Yes!" Eric turned from Kelso as trumpets of victory blasted in his ears. He cradled the sides of Donna's face, stroked her cheeks with his thumbs. "Yes, you finally get it. He _is_ hopeless."

She half-smirked and tugged on his sleeve. "Come on. Let's go."

Together, they went to the Pinciottis' backyard and into the kitchen. Bob and Joanne were elsewhere, which meant Eric and Donna could talk in private. "You want to go first?" he said.

Donna leaned her hip against the kitchen island and crossed her arms over her chest. "None of us are gonna be friends after this, are we?"

He swallowed, unsure about the thoughts spinning in his head. "I never cared about Kelso's shenanigans before. When he cheated on Jackie, the worst part for me was he used my sister to do it. But now..."

His shoulders hunched, and he rubbed his face with both hands. "Look, I can't beat him up the way Hyde can, okay? I have no outlet. And I'm a hypocrite because what he did to Jackie should've mattered, and it didn't. Not to me." He swallowed again. His throat had grown thick, making speaking difficult. "I should've kicked his ass out of the basement back then, but did I? No. I kept being his friend, and now I'm paying the price."

"Eric, you can't look at it like that." She touched the underside of his wrist, rubbed her fingertips over his pulse. "As much as you hate it, he kept me sane this summer and, in a way, safe. If sleeping with him was the dumbest thing I did, I'm lucky because we both know the path I was headed down."

He nodded. She was skipping school, getting drunk in the middle of the day, all because of Casey Kelso's influence. "You could've hooked up with a crime kingpin, been pulling bank heists—"

She laughed. "Exactly."

"But," he drummed his fingers on the kitchen island, "that doesn't take away the fact Kelso's a hypocritical asshole."

"I don't expect you to forgive Kelso, not as long as he's such a … _Kelso._ But I hope someday you'll understand he and I only happened because I let it—" she gestured to body, "and that he will never get near this juicy stuff again. You can trust that, and you can trust me."

"I do trust you, Donna." He drew her into his arms, but her breathing grew rough, as if she'd started to cry. "And no matter what happens with our friends," he said softly, "I won't leave you. Not again."

* * *

Jackie entered the basement just as Pink Floyd's "Breathe" ended. It had to be a sign because her lungs barely took in enough air. Stars sparkled in her vision, but through the twinkling haze, she spotted Steven. He was sitting at the far end of the couch. He'd propped his elbow on the couch's arm, and his head leaned against his knuckles.

All pretense of indifference had disappeared. His eyes were naked and fixed on the wall across from him. He seemed genuinely upset, and her lungs finally took in a proper amount of air.

She sat down next to him once the starts faded from her eyes, but he leaned away, as if she were diseased. "You reconcile with your 'boyfriend'?" he said.

"Not yet."

"Then what're you doin' here?"

"Trying to reconcile with my boyfriend."

He pushed himself up and sat on the couch's arm, apparently needing more distance from her. "I'm not your boyfriend," he said, but at least he'd stopped avoiding her gaze.

"Then what are we, Steven?"

He hesitated before answering. "Somethin' I didn't expect."

That was no kind of response, and she inched closer to him. "Look, I don't like that Donna and Michael slept together, okay? I hate it, but at the same time I'm relieved because it gets us off the hook."

His eyebrows rose, as if he were curious, but did he expect her to say more? Or did he want her to shut up? Her instinct was to talk, and she went with it.

"I'm sorry I called him my boyfriend," she said, "but I didn't expect any of this either. My mouth did a temporary time-warp, but my heart hasn't. It's here," she took his hand, "with you."

He didn't react to her touch. His fingers didn't even twitch, and he said, "So Kelso sleepin' with Donna gets us off the hook, huh?"

"Yes." She held onto him more firmly, fearing he'd try to escape. "Michael has no say in who I date anyway, but now he has no right to be angry I'm with one of his best friends. He fooled around with mine all summer."

"Still can't believe Donna would go for it "

"She dated one Kelso. Maybe she got the taste for them; I don't know."

"Once you go Kelso, you don't go back? Is that what you're sayin'?" He pulled his hand free and got off the couch. "Or maybe the only reason you started up with me in the first place was to get back at him—and the only reason you wanna keep us goin' is to keep your revenge goin'."

"How can you say that?" She stood up as tears rose in her eyes, and she closed the distance between them. "Okay, fine. Maybe I do have possessive feelings about Michael, but what am I supposed to do? He was my first boyfriend!"

Steven crossed his arms over his chest, and his jaw clenched, but he was still here. He was listening.

"But just like he has to deal with the fact I've moved on," she said, "I have to deal with the fact he'll parade girl after girl in front of me. And you know what?" She jabbed a finger at him. "You'll have to deal with the fact I have a past outside of you."

He didn't respond, but she pressed on, despite her stinging eyes and the pressure in her chest. "But it's the past, Steven. You're the present I want ... but if you're done with me because I said something stupid, I can't stop you!"

She was shouting now, but Steven was as stiff as a tree. Had he made up his mind already? It didn't matter. The last few weeks had been full of secrets, and he deserved the truth. "You won't have to see me in the basement anymore," she said, "because there'll be nothing left for me here. But I think it's a real waste because I love you."

His chest rose and fell visibly with his breaths. She counted them, and on the fifth he shouted, "I'm not saying it back!"

His response startled her, but she didn't flinch. Her voice was steady and quiet when she next spoke. "I don't care."

"Damn it!" He turned away and retreated to the clothes dryer. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose as he stood in silence. She'd never seen him like this, so conflicted. Her insides thrummed with nervous energy, but she copied his previous tree-like stance. She wouldn't move, not until he spoke again or left.

He turned back around after what seemed like hours. His eyes were closed, and when they reopened, the fear in them jolted her. She expected him to make another accusation, but he said, "So are you gonna be my chick or what?"

He'd spoken, but his question shuddered through her veins. It wasn't good enough, and she stared at him coldly.

"My girl … friend." he said slowly, as if trying the word on like a new shirt. "Girlfriend. My girlfriend, man. Will you be my girlfr—"

"Oh, Steven..." Joy bloomed in her stomach, and she dashed toward him. He hadn't said he loved her, but he didn't have to. She cupped his cheeks, and his face finally relaxed as she kissed him. The way he touched her was love, how he treated her. Someday he'd say the words, but for now the feeling was enough.

* * *

Kelso twisted, hot and sweaty, in his bed sheets. He'd expected Jackie to come crawling back to him tonight. When it didn't happen, he hoped Donna might stop by, for some sneaky consolatory sex. Eric had forgiven her once, so maybe he'd forgive her again.

But she didn't show up either, and Kelso was left to take care of himself. He should've been worse at it because after he finished, exhaustion opened up his brain. His friends' words stormed in— _hypocrite, delusional, selfish—_ tormenting him, keeping him awake.

He thrashed his legs. His sheets flew off the bed, but the truth clung to his thoughts. He hadn't just borrowed Donna. He'd tried to steal her, and a price had to be paid.

* * *

Donna dribbled the basketball down the Formans' driveway, intending to perform a layup. But as she neared the hoop, Jackie popped into her peripheral vision, and she fumbled the shot. The ball bounced off the backboard and into the garage. She chased after it, and when she returned to the hoop, Jackie was waiting for her.

"Hey," Donna said, forcing her gaze to stay on Jackie's face. Jackie had avoided her for days, both in school and outside of it. She needed space to breathe, so Hyde had said, whatever that meant.

"So, um … I'm just gonna get to it," Jackie said. "Why did you sleep with Michael?"

Donna squeezed the basketball under her arm. She would've given anything to sink into the pavement, but this conversation had to happen. "He offered, and I didn't know how else to feel better after Eric … well, you know."

"No, I don't know."

"Eric rejected me." Donna throat tightened at the memory, even after all these months. "He's, like, the love of my life, and losing him made me a little..." She twirled her finger around her temple.

Jackie tapped her foot, as if Donna's answer wasn't informative enough. "Were you really the only one he slept with?"

"Kelso was magnanimous—I mean, _monogamous_."

"Michael's never monogamous, at least not for long."

Donna considered dribbling the basketball for a distraction, but she switched the ball to her other arm. "Toward the end," she said, "he tried to do it with this one girl, Annette. But she wouldn't go for it. Otherwise, I pretty much preoccupied all of Kelso's time—" She winced. That sounded worse than she meant it. "Not the way you think. We went to the beach and amusement parks—"

"Okay, Donna, stop. I don't need details."

"Sorry." She gave the basketball one last squeeze and dropped it to the pavement. No more security blankets. No more hiding. "I really am sorry, Jackie. That word isn't adequate, but it's all I've got. If you'd slept with Eric this summer—"

Jackie's nose wrinkled. "Are you trying to make me vomit?"

"I'm just saying I wouldn't blame you if you never forgave me."

"I already have," Jackie said, and Donna's heart pulsed in her ears. She hadn't realized how fast it was beating. "What Steven did to Michael is the same thing you did to me," Jackie picked up the basketball and held it with both hands, "except I don't want Michael anymore. It's the lies that upset me. I'm the liar in relationships, okay? That includes ours."

"Neither of us should lie, but I hear what you're saying. And I won't lie to you again."

Jackie dribbled the basketball a few times and, to Donna's surprise, sunk a basket. "As awful as all this was, it turned out for the best. I'm with Steven now, and Michael has no grounds to complain. You actually did me a favor, so..." she smiled and rubbed Donna's arm warmly, "thank you."

The back of Donna's neck grew hot. She wasn't sure she deserved the thanks, but as long as their friendship was intact, she'd take it. "No problem," she said and scooped up the basketball. "You up for some one-on-one?"

"Are you kidding? I just got my nails done." Jackie grasped Donna's free hand and scrutinized it. "But how about if I fix up yours? You've been gnawing on them for weeks. They're not a chew toy, you know."

Donna tossed the basketball at the hoop but didn't care if she made the shot. She was too busy checking over her nails. The ends were ragged, and her cuticles were shredded."Oh, why the hell not?" she said with a shrug. "Okay."

"Great!" Jackie said and pulled her from the driveway. Donna was likely in for some pain, but she'd happily tolerate it. She had her best friend back and, in the bargain, would get her nails back, too.

* * *

Kelso had shunned the basement for a week. His mind was full of stupid urges, like shooting Hyde in the face with his BB gun. He tried to wait until his impulses calmed down, but he missed his friends too much. He returned on Friday afternoon, unsure of how he'd react. But his matches, firecrackers, and stink bombs were all at home, so he probably wouldn't do too much damage.

Everyone was gathered around the TV set, watching _Scooby-Doo._ Donna and Eric were snuggling on the couch. Jackie sat on Hyde's lap while his hands rested on her thighs. Only Fez was alone, but that didn't make Kelso feel any better.

Jackie should've been sitting on his lap, not Hyde's. Donna should've pushed Eric away and wrapped her legs around Kelso's hips. But those kinds of thoughts had gotten him into this mess, and he hit his forehead with the heel of his hand. He'd find another girl eventually, but his friends couldn't be replaced.

He stepped further into the basement, and Fez was the first to spot him. The lawn chair fell over as Fez leapt from it, and he thrust himself into Kelso's arms. "You're back! You're finally back!"

"Yeah, I am," Kelso said, "and I've got something to say."

"Is it about a UFO?" Hyde said.

"Or a bunch of dogs?" Jackie said.

"Or," Eric said, holding up a finger, "a UFO flown by a bunch of dogs?"

Kelso nodded. "Those are all pretty awesome things, but that's not what I want to talk about."

Fez went to the TV and shut it off. Everyone but Kelso groaned, and Fez clapped twice. "Let the man speak."

"Thanks, Fez." Kelso brushed the hair from his eyes and swallowed. Sincere apologies never came easily to him, but he'd never sleep again if he didn't try. "Eric, I'm sorry I nailed your girlfriend, like, a thousand times."

Eric scowled at him, and Kelso corrected his statement. "I mean _I'm_ _sorry_ a thousand times. Friends aren't supposed to break the code, but I did. I stabbed you in the back, and I know how that feels 'cause Hyde did the same to me—"

"Michael," Jackie said, but he talked over her.

"—only I deserved it, Eric, and you didn't. You never cheated on Donna, and..." His eyes flicked toward Jackie. Hyde's hands had locked over her stomach protectively. The sight raised Kelso's hackles, but he'd have to get used to it. "Jackie, I release you."

She flinched, as if she hadn't heard him right. "What?"

Kelso whistled and mimed freeing a bird from his hands. "That was you."

"Okay..." she said, not sounding convinced, but he'd done what he could do.

Donna whispered something in Eric's ear. He shrugged, and she got off the couch. "Kelso," she said, "can we talk in private?"

"If you want," Kelso said and waited for the objections: _"Don't let them go off together." "Remember what happened the last time they were alone?"_ But no one questioned them as Donna led him toward Hyde's room, not even Eric. It could've been an act, but Eric didn't bang on Hyde's door once it was closed.

"Don't say a word," Donna said and turned on the room's bare bulb, "or you'll ruin this."

Kelso's eyes widened. Was he getting his consolatory sex after all? "Donna, we can't—"

She mashed a finger against his lips. "I told you shut up." Her breath warmed his cheek before she kissed it. "Thank you for getting me through the summer … and thank you for apologizing to Eric."

He would've kissed her back, but he took a safer approach and shook her hand. "Thank you for doing it with me this summer."

She huffed out a breath. "Really, Kelso?"

"Yeah..." He shoved his fists into his jeans pockets and shifted his weight to his heels. "And thanks for, uh ... for not quitting on me. You know, as friends. 'Cause you totally should have."

"You're welcome," she said, giving his arm an affectionate squeeze. "I'll see you out there."

She left him alone in Hyde's room, and he rubbed his cheek. He went back to the basement after a minute and stood by Fez's chair. He didn't know where to sit. Donna had the far end of the couch occupied. Eric was beside her, but he locked eyes with Kelso and nodded at the couch's near end.

Kelso took that as a signal and sat next to him, spine straight. He couldn't relax, not until Eric said, "Kelso, it's okay."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Jackie said. "We're good."

"Long as _you're_ cool," Hyde said to him. His warning was clear, but so was his reassurance. If Kelso didn't act out, all would go back to normal. A different normal, but one he could live with.

He settled into the cushions and glanced at the surrounding stone walls. They no longer seemed dank and indifferent but cozy and welcoming. He might not have had a girl, but he still had his friends, and that was a good place to be.


End file.
